Welcome to the Sunday edition of the Phat Daily Column. Yes, it's late, but when you stay up to watch ECW's Hardcore TV online, and if you just happen to redesign the Phat Pharm right after the ECW show, you'd sleep in too! We have a good bit to cover today, with some PDC announcements at the bottom, ECW Hardcore TV review, ECW November to Remember predictions, Chyna on Mad TV, and more! On to the PDC.
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I told Debra: You either marry me, or I'll give you a stunner"
-Stone Cold Steve Austin on WSYX's Newscenter
Whatever happened in the first 10 minutes of this show.....well, I missed. I was doing that Stone Cold WSYX interview. However, I tuned it and actually caught a few laughs. The first skit I saw had Chyna with a fake Michael Cole and a fake Rock. The Michael Cole guy was weak, but that Rock impersonation was DEAD ON! I thought I was watching the Rock during that segment, without the muscle tone!
But anyway, the skit was about Chyna and the Rock getting an interview with Michael Cole for their upcoming match with the Dudley Boyz. The Rock imitation was ripping on Michael Cole, just like the Rock, and he was using many catchphrases, just like the Rock. I WAS MARKING OUT FOR THAT, and I don't mark out when I see the actual Rock, if you smell what I'm cooking.
The skit was about how they were producing the interview, as the rogue Rock messed up his lines, and they had to start over. When the cameras were "off" before they restarted the interview, Cole, Chyna, and the Rock would joke around with each other in between takes! It was hilarious! They started up again, and Chyna then messed up her lines. It was a very funny segment, and thanks to a PERFECT Rock imitation, it had me off my chair laughing several times.
Chyna didn't appear on skits until this stupid office skit were a too attached wimpy boyfriend was trying to get some off his white trash girlfriend. Chyna was the supervisor of that office, and she didn't take that guys crap for anything! She tossed him around like a ragdoll, because she's that damn tough! Chyna was wearing professional clothing, which you could clearly see that she was VERY COLD.
That's all that I saw that she was in. She might have been in the first 10 minutes, and I hope that someone will send in those first 10 minutes to cover me.
The DirecTV preview and other industry sources are claiming that Vince McMahon might return to RAW this Monday, or he'll return eventually. Many skeptics worry that Vince may be wearing himself thin with the XFL deal, possibly owning WCW, and having a television role with the WWF. What many don't know is that Vince is a machine, programmed to rule the world. You see, he'll take care of the XFL and WCW negotiations by day, and be the "screwjob" boss by night. How hard can that be? It also shows that Vince might be scared of the recent lower ratings, and that he is the answer to spiking the ratings. Yeah, he is actually, but that means actually stepping the WWF's intensity up a few notches.
If you saw the various television shows featuring Bret Hart, you'll know that he is indeed still bitter at Vince McMahon for the past. Bret questioned how Vince could wake up every morning as himself and be happy with it. Funny, because Bret Hart really loved Vince McMahon before Survivor Series 1997. But I guess one major screwjob can open your mind to how bad of a man Vince is. But I think he's really blaming Vince for his "attitude" WWF that was evolving during his final days in the WWF, and Bret has never been a fan of that. By the way, Bret will NOT be returning to the WWF, and let's hope he doesn't make himself a fool by going back.
According to Jim Ross, the Naked Mideon gimmick has been dropped. Yes, that's yet another drop in the pan for Dennis Knight, who has failed with gimmicks like Phineus Godwin, Southern Justice, Tex Slazenger, and the many many very versions of Mideon. Let me try to name them... Naked Mideon, APA wannabe Mideon, European Champion Mideon, Evil Ministry Mideon, and Stone Cold's Chair Bitch Mideon. There are probably a few more, but who cares. This man has more chances than anybody in wrestling to get "over". Naked Mideon was probably their best one yet, but they are caving in to political pressures, so it's back to the drawing board again!
So after several weeks of no ECW in my life, we return with Hardcore TV online!
I believe I missed the first few segments of this show since I clicked onto this show exactly at 12 am, which took a while to originally load up. The first thing I saw was the classic ECW intro...
One match I truly enjoyed was EZ Money against Kid Kash. Doing the ECW on TNN recaps, I never thought much of EZ Money, but he proved himself tonight. He whipped out some crazy spinning suplexes, and this awesome inverted Boston crab. EZ Money and his two goons, Hamrick and Julio, hit Kash with EVERYTHING. Kash would NOT go down. Kash eventually won with his dangerous finisher, which I bet will break a neck down the road. Excellent match, with Spike Dudley saving Kash at the end.
Next, we get Nova vs. Simon. Now, if many will claim that Rob Van Dam is overrated, then I'll say that Nova is overrated. Sure, he can whip out a move here or there, but as far as carrying a match, he's horrible. Simon tried to carry this match, and that's not a good thing to do. Chetti interfered, and helped Simon get the cheap win with Lou E.'s telephone.
Steve Corino vs. CW Anderson was truly an excellent "wrestling" match, which you don't normally see anymore....or at least successfully. CW hit Corino with everything but the kitchen sink, but Corino whipped out his reversed Twist of Fate to win the match. Lots of interference at the end of this match too!
Justin Credible, at the end, had an argument with Francine. Francine won't put out until Credible wins that title, but Credible said the following: "you'll either give it to me...or I'm going to take it", and he shoved Francine's head after saying it. Wow, does that mean he'll rape her if she refuses to give him any when he wants it, or if he loses at November to Remember? That's not cool. I guess that's ECW's way of giving this JOKE of a wrestler some heel heat, or I guess interest for tonight's Pay Per View.
Oh by the way.....this show is a week old, as I'm looking Bird33's report. I guess that's probably a provision to how AmericaOne.com carries ECW. I don't care. I was able to see ECW, and that's all I care about. I'm hoping that ECW hooks up with maybe ESPN 2, especially since USA Networks is hopeless and that XPW is getting very close with FX. Give me ECW!!! It will be really hard once school is in break for me to watch it over a modem, or if I happen to miss the exact time of 12 am on Saturday Nights.
Nova vs. Chris Chetti
Nova getting a win? I don't think so. ECW is high, and always have been high, on Chetti's talent, so look for Chetti to go over Nova. That way, Nova can continue to brag about how many moves he has invented and continue to wrestle in spots below the midcarders.
Tito's Pick: Chris Chetti
Simon, Swinger, and Julio vs. Kid Kash, Doring, and Roadkill
This match has the word "entertaining" written all over it! The heels go down here, because Kid Kash is the man! Plus, Roadkill and Doring always get their so called push, if you call it that.
Tito's Pick: Kash, Doring, and Roadkill
Flaming Tables: Chilly Willy/Ballz Mahoney vs. Da Baldies
I don't understand what goes on with Ballz in ECW, as some don't really like him in the back. But I see redemption on the Baldies in this match, as Ballz and Willy get the win. ECW is rather high on Willy I hear.
Tito's Pick: Chilly Ballz
Tag Titles: Whipwreck and Tajiri vs. the Full Blooded Italians
Possibly the match of the night, as the match between these teams for the Tag Titles where the FBI won was spectacular! All 4 of these guys can just take punishment like no other, and the team of Whipwreck and Tajiri can just dish it out! I see a title change now that Tajiri is back in the states full time again, but this feud won't end.
Tito's Pick: Tajiri and Whipwreck
TV Title: Rhino vs. New Jack
I bet New Jack will jump off the balcony onto Rhino, and Rhino will just get back up and spear New Jack! Nobody but Rob Van Dam will defeat Rhino, and that's questionable since RVD doesn't want to defeat Rhino just yet. This is ECW's way of making Rhino look tough since he's going over a long time star. Gee, I'd love to see New Jack get the Television title, because if there has been a man who has paid his dues, it's New Jack.
Tito's Pick: Rhino
World Title: Steve Corino vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Justin Credible
From this 'late' edition of Hardcore TV, I see lots of confidence going Credible's way again, and that makes me decide that Heyman is still high on Credible as a champion. Why, I don't know, but I'm just a columnist and he's the guy who runs the company. What can I say?
Tito's Pick: Justin Credible
Also, I want to give congrats to the latest Phat Pharm graduates, the Governor and Brendan Campbell. Check out Governor's column titled Non Sanctioned by Clicking Here, and check out Brendan's column I Know What You Did Last Monday by Clicking Here. Both were a treat to work with, and I only wish them the best.
But don't think I'll be leaving you guys empty handed Tuesday, because you'll see a lot of Tito on Monday. For one, I'll provide my Monday Night Hype in the Phat Daily Column. Two, I'll be posting my Al Gore vs. George W. Bush 3 tier cage match parody column to hype up election day in a "wrestling" way. Finally, I'll be re-launching the Phat Pharm with a brand-spanking-new Design, and BRAND NEW COLUMNISTS....not to mention a brand new Edition of Bad Tito to go along with that. So 3 columns by me tomorrow, and a relaunching of the Phat Pharm, if you can dig that!
@That's all for this super long column. Damn, I didn't expect it to be that long, but oh well. Sorry for the delay, but it happens. I'll see you tomorrow with 3 columns and the newly launched Phat Pharm!
Backyard BBQ: Click HERE for the Best in Backyard Wrestling!
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.