Welcome to the Wrath of Tito. There's a sale at Penney's! Ooops, wrong headline. I'm back to school, which means that I will now officially come to you TWICE a week with the Wrath of Tito, guaranteed. At least two, for I could write more than 2 per week, if I find the time.
I'll tell you this much: "Playmakers" has become my new addictive show, much like HBO's "OZ" was for a while. OZ had some of the best character development and storylines that wrestling could ever dream of, and from the first 2 shows, it appears that Playmakers is on that right path. I just hope ESPN doesn't go Mtv and stop playing what made them famous and that's sporting games in prime time. I see they have a new Reality TV starting, too.
Ok, back to the wonderful world of wrestling. I was perplexed by the story about Vince McMahon interrupting the Tajiri vs. Rhyno match. It's so hypocritical for Vince to tell his wrestlers to slow it down in the ring to avoid injuries, only to get bored with the matches. Maybe this gimmick was fixed at the houseshow he did it at, but if you handcuff your wrestlers, expect consequences. However, Vince is stupid enough with smaller wrestlers to see this as an act of laziness or that these two "don't have it", while feeling that wrestlers such as Albert or Big Show are drawing fans in or putting on good matches. Uh huh.
Triple H's injury keeps getting worse and worse, insomuch that he can't even move right now. Just quickly job the World Title on RAW, simply put. NOTHING can cure Triple H but rest and relaxation. I know he loves performing every night, but he needs some time off to heal up, just as fans need time off from Triple H due to overexposure and burn out from HHH being at the top. I'm not saying this just because I hate Triple H. It's simple logic, for if you have a bad injury, you need time off. He probably can't even run at this point, but yet he's still World Champion. Quit wasting our time and get that belt off of him ASAP so that he can take a nice 2 month break and return, becoming more refreshing to watch.
There's one issue that I wanted to tackle. This Thursday is September 11, the 2 year anniversary of 9/11, when terrorists slammed two planes into the Trade Towers in New York City. I can remember about a month ago that UPN received a great deal of grief for airing programming, while the rest of the networks were airing some sort of tribute programming in honor of the deaths occurred at 9/11. That's bullshit. UPN shouldn't receive any sort of grief for moving on, while the rest of the networks are reminding us of the tragedy that occurred 2 years ago. I, on a personal standpoint, don't want to see those specials on 9/11. Believe me, I'll always remember what happened that day, September 11th, 2001, and on this Thursday, my memories along with my best wishes to the families who lost lives in that tragedy will be there.
However, I don't wish to flip through several channels to see 9/11 specials everywhere. For one, I don't need reminded by a TV show about that day. I can look at the calendar or my watch and see "September 11" and remember what happened that day. Secondly, why replay all of the events of those days? The terrorist groups don't deserve seeing their footage on American televisions. Just simply say "our thoughts and prayers are with those who lost friends and family members on 9/11", maybe at the beginning of every show. No need to keep showing old footage. Everyone who watched it happen on TV that day will certainly NEVER forget what happened that day, and a simple small message tribute will do, not a several hour special on it.
So my props to UPN for moving on and providing something other than a 9/11 special. It's certainly not a ratings ploy, as I'm sure the 9/11 specials that do air will defeat UPN in the ratings, easily.
I read on 411mania that the lawsuit between the WWE and Lewmar Inc. is now underway. Lewmar was the equipment supplier for the attempted stunt that killed Owen Hart during the summer of 1999. The issue is over faulty equipment, as there's a dispute to whether the stuff the WWE bought was known to be only used for yachting and not for dangerous stunts. It's hard to say who will win this, but it's another he said, she said case that will get messy when there's a death involved. Same thing goes with deaths caused buy guns, as the gun manufacturers now get sued. Many reminders of the unfortunate Owen Hart death keep coming up...
Not much else in the wrestling world to discuss. Rather slow on the news, actually. Another great opening Sunday for the NFL, although my fantasy football teams seem to be off to slow starts. Nice of the Pittsburgh Pirates to trade away Brian Giles. Yeah, I like 2 of the players the Pirates received in return, but that's not the point. The point is that the Pirates were almost in a playoff hunt and they just opened up a stadium 3 years ago. Why not give the fans a REASON to come to the new facility? Then again, PNC Park's extremely high prices gives fans a REASON not to come anyway. I've began buying Friday the 13th DVDs lately, thanks to the craving started back up from Freddy vs. Jason. I have all of them on DVD but 7 and 9, which I'll work on getting (I may not get 9, for I hate that movie). Just looking at the ones I have, 1-5 are pretty good in my mind, while 6-9 are pretty ridiculous, although I think Jason is a F'N badass in 7. In parts 2-4, Jason was still somewhat real, although he died drowning many years before that. I probably like part 2 the best out of all of the movies.
On to RAW!
Smart thinking on the WWE's part to do Kane vs. RVD in the Cage first, although it will be hard not to change the channel to see the Eagles and Bucs play on ABC. Good to have Lilian Garcia AND Jim Ross actually tell us that you can win via pinfall, climbing over the cage, or going out the door. The WWE is never clear on that when they have cage matches. Gotta love how only Kane's arms were burned when an entire dumpster was set in fire. Oh wait, the WWE applied make-up this week. Yeah, that will make me care about that attempted angle. Match seems to be starting off slowly, with Kane walking around the ring and giving a slow beatdown on RVD. Kane can just walk out the door, whenever, but not today. Nice reversal by Kane on one of RVD's trademark kicks. The match ended, just as it was getting somewhat good, with RVD getting thrown through the cage. Wait, Eric Bischoff said the rules state that nobody can get thrown THROUGH a cage. Good point, and the match will continue after the break. *checks Monday Night Football* Come back, and Kane continues his dominance and eventually wins with a chokeslam. Well, that was an extended squash. Way to attract viewers with a one sided match, there WWE.
And now we do an injury angle with RVD. STOP THE LAME SHOCK VALUE!
Jerry the King Lawler said that last week's performance by Bill Goldberg was the FIRST reminder of the old 1998 WCW Goldberg. That's some bad commentary there. Eric Bischoff comes out and makes a match between Shane vs. Kane at Unforgiven, which doesn't get much crowd response. Of course, who wants to see that bullshit? I bet that Shane gets in more offense than RVD just did. He also makes Coach/Al Snow vs. Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler at Unforgiven. Bischoff also says "you two suck", which couldn't be more further than the truth. Lots of parodies of Ross and King lately. It makes me wonder how bad the WWE locker room wants them out as announcers. At Unforgiven, the commentating spots for RAW will be on the line. Tonight's main event will be Goldberg/Mystery Partner vs. HHH/Mystery partner, and Bischoff chooses the partners. Shock value!
The Triple H commercial for YJ Stinger is so damn lame!
Next match was Lance Storm vs. Rico. The "boring" gimmick is far more damaging to Storm's career than the stupid writers and commentators believe it is. Short match, but decent and it ended with Storm kissing Jackie Gayda and winning with the Missle Dropkick. He danced afterward. We'll see how that works in the upcoming weeks.
Backstage, Triple H wants to know his surprise partner. He threatens Bischoff cause he's the "Game", or just a guy with a torn groin who won't say "no" to time off.
Steve Austin would then come out to make a "State of RAW Address". What? Red carpet and podium in the ring, so I guess this is serious? Austin adds the stipulation that HHH loses the title if he disqualifies himself. I can tell that Austin isn't coming back as a wrestler, for he's really losing his muscle tone lately. Austin is upset about the rule about Austin being unable to attack other wrestlers unless provoked. Christian then comes out to talk some trash. Actually, he wants to replace Chris Jericho's Highlight Reel with the "Peep Show", and Jericho responds to the comment by coming down to the ring. Jericho, unlike Austin, seems to have trimmed down a little bit on weight, looking more cut. Jericho and Austin would banter back and forth, drink beer, and when Jericho pats Austin on the back, Steve was physically provoked to hit Jericho with a Stunner. Those Stunners don't generate business like they did in 1998.
Next, we had a 10 man tag team match between Henry/Mack/Conway/La Resistance vs. Dudleys/SHIT/Hurricane. Say it with me, folks: CLUSTERFUCK~! Well, not anymore, for everyone gets on the outside instead of chaos everywhere. So much for a tag format, as it turns back into a clusterfuck. Mack hit a spinebuster that received no crowd response, likewise for a slam that Henry did for his team to win. After the match, La Resistance tried to slam Spike onto the table on the outside. HOWEVER, in a very sick bump, Spike just nicks the end of the table with his head. Poor guy. You could see a piece of wood flicker off of the table.
Backstage, Snow/Coach are with Bischoff, and Bischoff makes their match with Ross/Lawler a tables match. Gail Kim would then enter the room and want some of Eric Bischoff, which I now consider Bischoff extremely lucky.
There were several backstage segments that I just rolled my eyes at and didn't type anything about. Eventually, we'd see Eric Bischoff and Shane McMahon arguing via satellite. Bischoff made Kane vs. Shane a "Last Man Standing" match. Just what we need, another stipulation added to Unforgiven.
The next match was Steven Richards vs. Scott Steiner. Why not push Richards? He does have size and ability, and he has had a past of drawing crowd reactions. Why not? What is so wrong with that idea? Poor guy just comes out and takes a beating every week, and I bet he never complains about it. We have a dead crowd for this squash match. Distractions would occur, Steven almost won from a Test interference, but Steiner prevailed and beat Richards. This feud is soooo long! They argue afterward, and set up a match at Unforgiven. Guess what? A stipulation was added to this, with it being Stacy and Steiner's services on the line. Oh God, help me from NOT-over wrestlers and bad writing.
In the ring, it's Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow. They use JR's face with various pictures, and it's not funny. Well, I laughed at JR the Hut. MY GAWD! HOW MUCH MORE OF RAW CAN MR. TITO TAKE?!?! Jim Ross is upset and comes ot the ring, and Lawler follows. Ross would punch Coachman after the Coach tasked Ross. MY GAWD, THIS FEUD SUCKS! Total filler, both on tonight's show AND at the Pay Per View.
Our main event was Bill Goldberg/??? vs. Triple H/???. Bischoff comes out and names Ric Flair as HHH's mystery partner. With Flair being HHH's partner, it's only obvious that Randy Orton would be Goldberg's partner, and he was. The triple teaming occurs, and HHH calls for the cage to be lowered. A chair gets involved, Goldberg takes another rough chairshot, and a beatdown ensues. Bladejob on Goldberg, and Evolution continues the beatdown to finish out the show. Rather humiliating for Goldberg, a guy who used to walk through stables during his matches (Raven's Flock and the NWO). Uh oh, the first attempt at the Pedigree was botched, as Goldberg could be politically in trouble now. End of show.
LAST WORD: Another poorly written RAW, and another RAW with bad wrestling. Are they even trying? This show gets a [ C- ] (C minus) for a boring show. Anybody else fear that Bill Goldberg, in the end, is being set up for a big failure?
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@That's all for today's column. Just chill till the next episode....