Welcome to Mr. Tito's Phat WEEKEND Column. Ok, why is it called "Weekend Column", you ask. Well, the fact of the matter is that it's become very hard to write up two columns per weekend, so I figured, "why not write a weekend column?" That way, I have no pressure on me to post it, as I could post this column either Sunday or Saturday. Damn I'm smooth.
But the fact of the matter is that not only am I busy, but that wrestling material is becoming hard to write about anymore. During the week, I discuss the current events, over and over again. I could discuss the past, like I used to, for the Saturday columns, but that somewhat gets old after a while. Plus, I about burnt out most of the early 1990s column material, and anything before 1990, well, I was just still a kid back then to remember anything in great detail.
On the subject of histories, I've had several requests for the Hulk Hogan (America) vs. Sgt. Slaughter (Iraq) history. No, no, and a BIG NO!! Why? Well, back when I was still a youngster, I had no problem with the feud. Of course, I was a wrestling mark that was totally addicted to the WWF and didn't know any better. As I grew older, I realized how a ridiculous and tasteless storyline it was to have the WWF play out America vs. Iraq in their arenas. So with my change of mind, I don't think I could write up a fair account of it. Plus, I really don't want to do it, because I did discuss it many times before.
Oh yeah, I started Mick Foley's second book! I decided to say "SCREW SCHOOL" and start reading these damn wrestling novels. Actually, I didn't do that, but I hurried up and finished my weekend homework (including reading several chapters of shit) so that my very late evenings (Midnight and beyond) reading some of Foley, after I get back from work or Mrs. Tito's. Hopefully, I can get through it smoothly so that I can FINALLY review that, and then quickly read Kurt Angle's to get caught up on my reading material.
For wrestling books, I suppose I have a new outlook on independent books (non WWF or WCW books). Instead of putting up with stupid internet orders, I will only review such books if one is sent to me for free. So say you're a wrestler out of the WWF right now or out of the spotlight for a while, and you want your book reviewed, please send me a copy and I gladly take some time out to read it. For books such as Gary Michael Capetta and Dynamite Kid, I had trouble ordering the books, was about to be charged a ridiculous price, or just had problems finding it online. Not anymore. Send one in, and I'll review it. Hell, if the publishing companies want to me to return a book that they send me, I can do that.
Well, it's safe to say that we won't be seeing any VHS reviews of WWF Action. From all of the match listings sent in to me, I have decided to avoid this one, as it looks about as worse as Best of RAW Volume 3. Geesh. What happened to WWF videos? They soooo used to be worth my money, but now, they only appeal to the brainwashed marks.
While we're still on the subject of videos, remember that Wrestling Bloopers video that I talked about? It's called "Wild World of Sports Wrestling Bloopers", and let me tell you, it's NOT a bloopers tape filled with corny gimmicks, storylines, or blown spots. Oh no. This tape was just a collection of taped segments from matches, which had fancy moves that aren't amazing these days. I guess the tape makers laughed at what they saw, hoping everyone else would laugh too. It wasn't too bad, although I could have been without the 1980s porno music in the background. It had various old clips of people like Dick Murdoch, Andre the Giant, Dusty Rhodes, Missing Link (!!!), Junkyard Dog, and many more oldschool wrestlers. I guess for $5, I got what I paid for.
How about some Apples? You know, I wonder if the Rock would like some Apple pie? On to the PDC.
-Bravo to Bill Goldberg. There's just something about Bill Goldberg and Bret Hart, as they know how to make "shoot" comments at the right time. Goldberg made a truly excellent point about how none of the WWF wrestlers or personalities made it out to the "Ground Zero" site at New York City, where the World Trade Centers once were. It took a lot of guts to say what he said, as the WWF may be his only possible chance for employment, if he ever wants to wrestle again. I'm sure a whole busload of WWF superstars will now head on over there.
-Wow. The internet is showing deep concern for Tough Enough 2, as it's going to reportedly feature any independent wrestler who wants to train with the WWF. Ok, my 2 cents about this situation is this: the show will suck if you have independent wrestlers trying out. Tough Enough thrived on having geeks off the street attempting to become wrestlers, with only 5 people surviving out of 13 or whatever. I don't really see much out of having Al Snow as a mentor to a bunch of independent guys, who already know how to do a lot of wrestling stuff already. Just don't see it.
+I do have one suggestion for Tough Enough 2, if the WWF is going to use independents. Why not have Taylor, Chris from Harvard, and Josh stick around. I'd say they are good enough to compete with independent made wrestlers. Why not?
-Oh lord... Looks like at least one half of KroniK is sticking around. The Undertaker's good pal, Bryan Adams still has a job with the WWF, as he'll actually go to HWA or OVW. Geesh. When you suck, but you're Undertaker's pal, you'll always have a job in the WWF. However, Brian Clarke isn't so fortunate. Because he's NOT the Undertaker's friend, he won't be working for the WWF in any capacity. So sad. I bet you that Adams will eventually come back to the WWF in the upcoming weeks, thanks to the Undertaker's seniority and how the WWF always gives into him. You know, WCW gave into Hulk Hogan every time that old fart attempted something, and look where it took them.
-Jim "I love myself and enjoy the ego I get from being head of talent operations" Ross reported that Triple H should be returning sometime in December. D'oh. I figured that he would be returning sometime in November to help hype up Survivor Series. I wouldn't doubt that the Game runs in at Survivor Series though. Looks like Triple H's big wrestling return will be at the December Pay Per View called....
-Apparently, the WWF has ditched the name of Armageddon for the December Pay Per View. Good. I never really liked that Pay Per View name, as I dislike any of the names outside of the fab 5 (Royal Rumble, Wrestlemania, King of the Ring, Summerslam, Survivor Series). So what could we call this? I have a weird suggestion. How about Starrcade? When I think of December Pay Per View names, STARRCADE comes to mind, always. Ehhh, that's a crazy suggestion, but who knows? Starrcade has been going on since the early 1980s, and it has NEVER taken a year off, even last year! Although the last few Starrcades have been weaker than the past stuff, it has still carried the tradition of holding the show every year.
Arizona over Atlanta
Denver over Baltimore
San Diego over Cincinnati
Jacksonville over Cleveland
Green Bay over Carolina
Indianapolis over New England
Washington over Kansas City
Miami over St. Louis
New Orleans over NY Giants
Pittsburgh over Buffalo
Oakland over Seattle
Tampa Bay over Minnesota
Philadelphia over Dallas
San Francisco over NY Jets
I took lots of ballsy choices this week. I have a feeling that Stephen Davis will have a big game against the Chiefs... I'm a bit leary on the Tampa Bay vs. Minnesota game. Despite the problems that occurred last week for the Vikings, they are still one of the more dangerous offenses in the league. Once that sleeping giant wakes up, look out. I'm sure there are a few questional picks, but your record doesn't fair well if you avoid taking chances.
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@That's all for today. I hope to get some reading in this weekend from Mick Foley's second book. Until the Monday column, just chill......
Phat Pharm: Wrasslin' Columns!
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.