Welcome back to the one and only Phat Daily Column. Yes, I won't be here tomorrow, but I have a whole lot to offer today. For one, you can check out my parody column of Al Gore vs. George W. Bush where they fight in a 3 Tier Cage match. Also, I've revamped the Phat Pharm, and a new Bad Tito is up and ready to read. For today's PDC, we shall discuss the upcoming Monday Night Shows, and hype them up. Yes, I won't be able to discuss what I'm hyping tomorrow, but I'll gladly do that Wednesday with the ratings. On to the PDC.

MONDAY NIGHT HYPE

-RAW is WAR-

SMELL THE RATINGS!!!

Since the WWF was down in the ratings last week, they have already announced their main event for RAW tonight. We will be seeing the team of Stone Cold Steve Austin and the Rock (**Pauses so that many can instantly mark out for them**) to go up against Kurt Angle and Rikishi.

Yes, Austin and Rock had their problems on Smackdown, so the WWF figures that everyone will just mark out for them tagging together. That's why they hyped it early.... they are scared of the ratings right now. TNN, Viacom, and Vince McMahon just pushed the panic button off of last week's dismal effort on TNN, and they will try to surprise us.

Vince McMahon himself MAY be on the show, as the wonderful DirecTV preview tells us. Yay, if it happens, all of the McMahons will clusterfuck the whole show again, giving us about four 15 minute interviews per night. Yes, that's all we need right now. Vince sees the ratings starting to drop, so he himself is going to do something about it. What confidence!!!

Hey, maybe we'll see the RTC getting shoved down our throats? Maybe they'll hype the Radicals will gang up on more individuals. Maybe Chyna will put on more weak matches. Maybe the WWF will continue to put on effortless shows since their competition has no leadership to make a charge?

-NITRO-

Something will involve Ric Flair this week, since he's the CEO of WCW. Well, as long as they give him camera time, oldschool fans WILL WATCH IT. Notice how his segment was the highest rated in the second hour? WCW bookers, take note, because Flair can STILL draw the ratings. So when he's able to wrestle, have him fight several wrestlers from the Natural Born Thrillers to give interest from both kinds of fans. Funny, that's what the NWA/early WCW did with Sting back in 1988. Older fans loved Flair, and younger fans liked Sting....make them feud, and you have instant money. It's that easy. Now if they'd only give the booking responsibilities to Ric.......

A former WCW World Champ will be returning to Nitro tonight. Oh please don't let it be Hogan!! I suspect it will be Diamond Dallas Page, who WCW is insisting on keeping. Oh well, he'll spark my interest for this show if he happens to be there. Don't doubt that Kanyon would be there too, and don't forget about Vinnie Poo, Vince Russo, who just happens to be on WCW Live after Nitro. Oh god, there went the spark!

Bam Bam Bigelow will face Bill Goldberg. Now, WCW is hyping this one up like no other, and they expect to spark fan interest for this. HA! How can you be interested in something you already know the outcome of? WCW should have never gave into Goldberg's idea of the streak, because it's too predictable. They need to somehow screw him over on his streak to make things interesting. Yes...Goldberg looks much better when he's vulnerable..... see the Scott Steiner matches.

Someone will challenge General Rection for a shot at his US Title. Gee, I wonder if Meng could be the challenger? Who knows, maybe Lance Storm will go under a mask, which hasn't been done before (oh no), and attack Rection. Who cares? Last week was touching for Rection, and I feel bad for his head trauma and also for the fact that the WCW locker room respects him. But he's just not an interesting US champ..... however, I guess that's ok when nobody will watch WCW anyway, so why care?

ECW November to Remember

All hail Steve Corino, the NEW ECW World Heavyweight Champion!!! I don't care if the King of Oldschool isn't ready for it... as long as Justin Credible Montoya doesn't win that title, I'll remain happy.

I guess Paul Heyman just LOVES to screw around with what's expected of his shows, because I was thinking the Tag Titles and the World Title would go to Credible or remain with Lynn. Heyman is well known for his playing to the "smarts", as he continued that very tradition tonight.

I really wonder how this buyrate will be affected without Rob Van Dam on the card?

Phat Pharm Relaunched!!!!!

Phat Pharm has been relaunched with a BRAND NEW Design, 5 newly added columns, and a new edition of Bad Tito!!!! I've sort of got behind on the Pharm due to stressful schoolwork, but now I've stepped it up. The Natural Born Pharmers are here, and I, Coach Tito, invite YOU to check out some developing columns and a very controversial Bad Tito. So.... CLICK HERE to check out the newly Launched Phat Pharm, with new columns, design, and the latest Bad Tito!!!

Also today...check out the Al Gore vs. George W. Bush 3 Tier Cage Match for the Presidency of the United States of America! CLICK HERE to check it out!

Backyard BBQ: News added, great sites, and more! Check out the Best in Backyard Wrestling!

@That's all for today. Remember, NO PDC tomorrow! I'll be heading home to vote, because I enjoy the priviledge, so see you until Wednesday.

NEWLY Revamped Phat Pharm: New Design, a debut column entitled "The Outspoken Word", and a new edition of "BAD TITO". CLICK HERE TO ENTER!!!

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.

Mr. Tito 2000 Exclusive to Lordsofpain.net