Welcome folks to another Weekend edition of the Phat Daily Column. Today's mission is a simple one: hype and predict Sunday Night's Survivor Series! I'm convinced that this Pay Per View may be the hardest to predict out of the WWF's shows this year, thanks to the many tanked storylines, title changes, and confusion created by the WWF. Maybe that was their whole goal for the month of November. Who knows?
But what I do know is that as I'm writing this intro, I do not know who I'm going to pick. Usually, I have a general idea of who I'm going to pick, coming in. However, today, I'm going to improvise as I go along, or at least that's the idea for today.
To get ready for Survivor Series, I popped in Survivor Series 1991, which featured the Undertaker against Hulk Hogan. To this day, I'm amazed at how Hogan totally no sold the Tombstone. I'm not bashing it, but just saying how funny it is to watch. As everyone knows or should know, it was the Undertaker's first World Title win.... although it didn't last for long.
On to the PDC.
Since this angle has badly failed, because it's the writers/McMahon's faults, it's time to end it with a winner-take-all Survivor Series main event, pitting 5 Alliance stars against 5 WWF stars. The challenge was offered by Vince McMahon, who really wants to end this failed angle (again, it's partially his fault), and Shane/Stephanie accepted. Again, thanks to horrible storylines, this match hasn't been getting the hype it deserves until Monday and Thursday, with two decent shows to hype the Pay Per View.
Team WWF was originally supposed to have Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho, Undertaker, Kane, and the Rock, until the writers and Vince McMahon wanted to pull a swerve on an edition of RAW. They turned Kurt Angle, which was decided on the same day it happened. After that, Team Alliance was announced as Kurt Angle, Steve Austin, Booker T, Rob Van Dam, and Shane McMahon. Seeing Shane McMahon on Team Alliance, Vince McMahon decided that he should wrassle on Team WWF, himself, along with The Rock, Chris Jericho, Kane, and the Undertaker. Later, though, Vince McMahon would replace himself with the Big Show, which he should have done in the first place. What horrible preparation and writing!
Throughout the month, the WWF has tried to push the idea that the teams didn't get along with their own members. Chris Jericho and the Rock are continuing their hatred for each other, and RVD and Booker T have started their own little feud or rivalry. Also, Vince McMahon's announcement that Steve Austin would join the WWF, Austin has been under fire as a possible traitor by all of the Alliance members. Got that?
Also, the remainder of the Survivor Series card was only announced starting Monday and solidified on Thursday! Yes, the booking-on-the-fly method by the WWF does not work, and by the way, this type of half-ass booking hurt the stability of WCW's storylines back in the day. Just thought I'd mention that, AGAIN! The Mick Foley "shoot" on RAW announced that there were too many titles around, therefore, it would lead to some unification matches.
First, we'll see Edge vs. Test. These two have been feuding all month, with Test cheating to win the Intercontinental title from Edge in a booking-on-the-fly title change. To make the unification process work, Kurt Angle jobbed his newly won WCW US title to Edge on RAW to get a spot against Test. Got it? For the tag titles, the Hardy Boyz won the WWF titles from Booker T/Test, setting up another Dudleys vs. Hardys match, but this time, it's in the cage.
Also on the show, we'll see Tajiri vs. William Regal. Tajiri turned down Regal's polite offer to join the Alliance, and ever since then, they've been fighting. Also, since the WWF felt the need to bring back the worthless Women's title, we'll see a 6 lady free for all for the title. Joy. And finally, we'll see an Immunity Battle Royal, in which the winner will keep his job no matter what happens.
And that's how this whole show was brought about, at least from what I remember or actually cared about. On to the predictions!
William Regal vs. Tajiri
Regal has pounded the living daylights out of Tajiri in their previous matches, therefore allowing Tajiri to get the David vs. Goliath victory. Torrie Wilson could be likely to interfere.
Tito's Pick: Tajiri
Women's Title: Lita vs. Ivory vs. Trish Stratus vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jackie vs. Mystery Opponent
Who the hell cares about this match? The mystery opponent is an Alliance member or a would be one. Some are speculating that Jazz, formerly from ECW, will be the one, but I don't know... I think it would be sort of cool for it to turn out to be Nidia from Tough Enough. At least it would get some reaction as compared to an unknown Jazz. Out of all of these ladies, which has the most job security?
Tito's Pick: Lita
Tag Team Unification, Steel Cage match: Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boys
With the Matt Hardy and Lita relationship, I wouldn't doubt that Matt could ruin Lita's chances in the Women's match... hmmmm. But anyway, I somehow see the Dudleys winning this one, which could see a Matt Hardy heel turn. Wait, that wouldn't make any sense, because if Matt turned on his brother to lose this match, he'd be out of the job if the WWF wins. Well, I think the WWF will win the big main event, therefore making the Dudleys "immune" if they win the titles.
Tito's Pick: Dudleys
Secondary Title Unification match: Test vs. Edge
Edge has one coming on Test, for Test got the dirty IC title win over Edge earlier. That is, unless the evil Christian shows up for a screwjob finish, since he doesn't happen to be booked on the show yet (thanks to the LoP WWF Message Board for pointing that one out!).
Tito's Pick: Edge
Unemployment Match: WWF vs. the Alliance: Big Show, Undertaker, Kane, the Rock, and Chris Jericho versus Kurt Angle, Steve Austin, Booker T, Shane McMahon, and Rob Van Dam
I think that the fact that Shane is on Team Alliance will say something. My prediction is as follows: Remember how Vince said that Stone Cold will turn on the Alliance? What says that all 4 Alliance teammates wouldn't turn? What if they totally screw Shane, therefore having an excuse to remain on television, since they signed WWF contracts beforehand? Therefore, it would kick Shane McMahon, Stephanie McMahon, and Paul Heyman off the show. Stephanie could come back through her husband, Heyman wouldn't come back, and Shane could eventually weasel his way back in. If RVD, Angle, Austin, and Booker T turned, they'd stay on WWF television. I believe that some variation of this idea will hold true, and Team WWF will win. I could be very wrong on this idea, though.
Tito's Pick: Team WWF
Don't ever doubt, for a second, that Triple H could show up...................
December's idea will be the placement of those wrestlers out of the job. Each will either get unfortunately cut by WWFE (real life), or find a way to join whichever side wins on the Survivor Series.
But the more intriguing factors are the returns of certain wrestlers to the WWF. I believe that the WWF and namely Jim Ross is BSing us when he says that Triple H isn't returning until January. Either Triple H will have a role tomorrow night (or tonight, depending on when you're reading this), or he'll show up on RAW/Smackdown in the future to spike their ratings. Also on the returns, I still don't doubt that Scott Hall and Kevin Nash will one day show up in the WWF. They can complain about the amount of dates all they'd like, but those two get off on the chance to be in the spotlight again.
One thing to notice, though, about the title situation: the World Titles survive! I'm guessing that we'll see Rock vs. Austin at the December Pay Per View and/or Royal Rumble to unify the titles. Therefore, look for that match in the future.
WRESTLEPALOOZA.com: Audio Show, news, columns, and more!
KOLTERSHOCK!!!! You KNOW you want to check it out!
@That's all for today. I'll be back on Monday for my Survivor Series thoughts. Until then, just chill.......
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.