Welcome back to column that screams Tito, the Phat Daily Column. Yeah, I took yesterday off, but we could blame the good old e-mail for that one. I've been having bad loading troubles with my account, so I said "hell with it", and cleared all of the e-mails out. I was intending to have the Shouts as a big part of yesterday's column, but now that the e-mails are gone, we can't just do that now. Sorry for anyone who sent anything in.
So I tried to write a column besides that, but couldn't. Thus the day off. I seem to always have a good excuse for the days off, don't I? Keep in mind that I'll be taking a good bit of time off for next weekend, since Finals week starts on June 4th for me. Ugh, I HATE school!!!!
In non wrestling news, I suggest everyone to check out a Gameboy Advance sometime soon. It's legit, the best handheld system on the planet, and it's even better than some game systems. I played Super Mario Advanced, which is like a really updated Super Mario Brothers 2 from the NES, and damn, I was impressed. If you go to a place where you could try one out, take the chance! It's quite impressive. What's even more impressive is how the original Gameboy (although colorized now) has lasted this long in the video game market. Didn't Sega make fun of the Gameboy years ago in their advertisements for Game Gear? I'm sure everyone's Game Gears are sitting on the shelves, collecting dust these days.
First segment is a good old Vince McMahon interview. You know, deep down inside, many of the WWF wrestlers must just be frustrated with the amount of time Vince spends on himself for television. Actually, this interview or whatever was informative, for McMahon announced the Triple H injury, and then mentioned that he'll "punish" Chris Jericho and Chris Benoit by booking them in a TLC match against Edge/Christian, Dudleys, and the Hardys. Hey, that works for me.
Pretty good match between Eddie Guerrero and X-Pac. These two actually have a history of good matches, although it's from another federation. If anything, I suggest you rent Souled Out 1997 for their Ladder Match over the United States title, which is quite a battle. Anyway, why the clean win for X-Pac??? It seems apparent that the WWF is pushing Eddie as a face, and X-Pac as a future tag wrestler, so what do they do? Put X-Pac over Eddie, cleanly. It was a good sequence finish, however, but still....... Who knows, though? Maybe X-Pac will get that determination back into his blood, and become a good singles wrestler again.
Wow, Tajiri showed up last night as William Regal's servant. Hmmm, that's interesting. At least Regal could talk for Tajiri, which is very much needed since the Japanese Buzzsaw can't speak English yet. We'll just have to see if the WWF will let him wrestle or just have an on-camera role as a Japaneze Butler. I'm sure he'll wrestle sooner or later, since the WWF signed him for his wrestling ability, I'd hope.
Oh my gosh, what a brutal beating by Kurt Angle on Spike Dudley. Angle is one wrestler the WWF must utilize with Triple H down and out with a knee injury. Hell, they should have utilized him better while Triple H was still around, anyway. Angle let Spike have it, as he kept the ankle-lock on for a while until Molly Holly ran down to save her man. That prompted the other Hollys, Bob and the little whiny midget, to run down and pully Molly away. Maybe Crash and Spike could wrestle at King of the Ring for a "Molly Holly on a forklift" match? That would be "entertaining".
I guess the WWF gave the Anaheim fans a bathroom or snack break with the Raven vs. Dean Malenko match. It was a well worked match by two seasoned veterans, but face it. Raven is not a face wrestler, and Dean Malenko is not a "sports entertainment" wrestler. Put them together, what do you get? After the match, Perry Saturn took an EVENFLOW DDT (not Raven effect) on a chair by Raven, which led him to be knocked silly again. Hey, it's something that may give something interesting for Saturn. I say turn Raven heel, and make Saturn and Raven an evil team again, since they were lethal in WCW. But hey, that was WCW.
The Blackman and Trish skit was just looney. The WWF should really play off Blackman's serious attitude much more, because I about spit out my drink when he dropped his Kendo Stick when Trish was changing. I take it the WWF writers have been watching "Robin Hood: Men in Tights" for that skit, although a Kendo Stick was used instead of a sword. If the PTC writes up the WWF for that skit, I'll personally go off on them for days.
LONG interview by Steve Austin. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. He does tell us that he doesn't need Triple H, which is probably setting up a swerve for 6 months down the road. I did like how Austin was dogging the Anaheim crowd, which actually fired them up after watching Raven vs. Malenko.
Blackman/Trish/Grandmaster Sex-ay vs. the Right to Censor was ok, as I still question when the RTC will officially break up. Oh wait, you can't do anything else creatively with Bull, Goodfather, and Val Venis. My bad. I'm surprised Trish didn't burst one of her enhancements after the match during the Worm.
Big Kane got the win over former hardcore champion, Rhyno. It's about damn time the WWF gives the Big Red Machine a respectable singles title reign. Rhyno loses no heat by losing, since he's still new, you know? I'm still bitter about Monday's match against the Big Show, although I think the WWF may be making Rhyno pay dues for something bigger down the road. It sure seems like it, especially with Paul Heyman around pulling some strings.
Before we go the main event, let's address something. I keep seeing constant complaints about the WWF putting on Ladder matches. Certain people were bitching about the WWF making the Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit 3rd Fall a ladder match, and then the same savages were yelling about the TLC match on Smackdown. My question is this: what else can the WWF do? The WWF has burned out every possible singles match, without gimmicks, know to man. Cage matches have lost their purpose, Hardcore matches are just lame due to the shitty weapons and the overdone table spots, and regular matches have a chance to bore the "sports entertainment" fans. So why not go with a match that will always work, especially in a time when the WWF NEEDS ratings and NEEDS buyrates? The WWF is putting on the TLC match here, last night, because they NEED ratings for Smackdown. What else could they put on? Every other match has been exhausted.
The TLC match between Edge/Christian, Dudley Boyz, Hardy Boyz, and Chris Jericho/Chris Benoit was just fabulous. Out of the 3 TLC matches, ever, I'll rank this one 2nd, behind the Summerslam bout and before the Wrestlemania 17 match up. Just some brutal chairshots in this one, with some great drama for a televised match. I really hope this match shoots up the Smackdown rating, because the work of the 4 teams is worthy of praise. I'm wondering how many non-wrestling fans would just watch after flipping around and seeing various stunts performed here. The crowd was standing up for the whole match, which if you say "ladder matches are overdone", then the crowd proved you wrong. They were excited, as was I, to watch the match.
LAST WORD: Wow, what a Main Event! Two of the best televised main events, ever, in one week by the WWF. That's what low ratings will push you to do. I wasn't too big on the interviews, which lowers the grade, as do a few matches. The opener was good with Guerrero and X-Pac, and a few other entertaining moments of Smackdown give this show a B+ (B plus) in my gradebook. It must be an all around good or strong show for me to consider an "A" grade.
4. Kane: About time he got a singles title again, besides the Hardcore. If Kane wins the European Title, he'll be the ultimate Grand Slam champion.
3. Steve Austin: Made the most with the Undertaker, and put over Jericho greatly. It should be interesting what he'll do for Jericho at King of the Ring, although my money says the WWF is aiming to have Rock vs. Austin for the World Title at Summerslam.
2. Chris Benoit: He's wrestled quite a bit this week, and never losing a step, either. Hopefully, Benoit will find what makes Jericho gain the big crowd pops, and he'll get the same push.
1. Chris Jericho: Wrestling at his best right now, and the push is coming his way. Will he make the best of it?!?
NEWS ORGY: New Design, Staind CD Review, Anger starting over "Pearl Harbor" movie, new commentaries including a Sports Rant, "Shrek" Movie Review, and MUCH MORE!!! So Click Here to join the Orgy!
CLICK HERE to listen to the latest show, which features an interview with former WCW valet Daffney. Be sure to check regularly for any announcements concerning possible guests on the show. Also, check out the archives, which features interviews with Bobby "the Brain Heenan", Spike Dudley, Dr. Death, Dusty Rhodes, and Lenny Lane.
Backyard BBQ: The Best in Backyard Wrestling!
KOLTERSHOCK!!!! Friday Night Film Frenzy!!!!!
@That's it for today. I really hope to be back with some sort of history column tomorrow, since I took last week off. I'll figure something out. See you tomorrow!
Phat Pharm: New Columns like "The Receiving End", "Right to Wrestle", and "Behind the Shotgun's Barrel" to READ, so CLICK HERE!!!
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.