Welcome to an all new edition of the Phat Daily Column, for Friday, March 8th, 2002. It's time to review Smackdown AND Tough Enough 2, for a nice 2 and a half hours of wrestling viewing. Happy Happy, Joy Joy. Today, however, we'll be doing a LIVE column for a LIVE Smackdown, as I have the Laptop from Hell fired up to write the column as I watch Smackdown on television. I can't see the television from the Hewlett Packard from Heaven. I've got some things to tend to tomorrow, hence the reason for the LIVE PDC.
On to the PDC.
THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE, THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE! Speaking of Marilyn Manson, I seem to have a fetish with downloading remixes or rare songs of his.
Ric Flair rushed into the ring, looking pissed off as hell! Flair cut a mean promo on the Undertaker, and then declared that he's a wrestler and accepted the Wrestlemania challenge. Good stuff. Flair was even slapping his own face, in hopes of busting himself open. The Undertaker would then come out, and declared that he was unsure that he'd want to fight Flair at Wrestlemania. HA! To add some more heat, the Undertaker also said that he'd forgive Flair from everything done to him. Undertaker would then say he'd give Flair his answer about the match later tonight. Bastard.
Stephony McMahon is shown, and Triple H gets in her way backstage. How, Steph's hives disappeared. Not only is she a bad writer, but she has super healing powers. They are fighting over a dog? Wow, compelling writing here.
William Regal came down to do color commentary. Gee, I wonder if he'll interfere in RVD's match? ONE OF A KIND! Rob Van Dam comes down to his usual cheers. I'll tell you what, I'm beginning to hear "One of a Kind" on various radio stations in my area. Goldust came out, to his 1996 entrance. Lots of "RVD" chants. Ha, the WWF can't edit out chants in live shows. Trashcans aren't hardcore. Nice touch, though, by making the chairs and trashcans "gold". William Regal blasted RVD with the knucks. Not bad on the match, although too short. RVD is a star, but the WWF doesn't really want to admit it yet. They better give the IC title to him at Wrestlemania.
RAW hightlights: PREPARE TO FAST FOWARD! FAST FOWARDING SIR!
Stephanie and Chris Jericho backstage. Once again, Stephanie makes Jericho look like a fool. Isn't he the current World Champion? Stephanie would give Jericho the first ever robe that Triple H ever had. Odd. They almost kissed, but hugged instead.
Holy Tajiri! I guess he's back as a Cruiserweight champion, again. Booker T would come down, as he's fighting Tajiri because of the Shampoo commercials. Uh huh. These two have never performed a good match together, for some reason. Man, both Tajiri and Torrie Wilson are so poorly used. Decent match, as Tajiri looked exceptionally good in this match. Back to Mtv Heat he goes... For some reason, Edge runs in. Why? Booker T just reacted to the Shampoo endorsement of Edge, but he never attacked Edge beforehand. Oh well, it should be a good filler match at Wrestlemania.
Man, lots of fast fowarding moments tonight. The Desire video for the Rock suffered this fate.
The Rock would come down for an interview, fresh off a few weeks of healing from "injuries" sustained by Hogan ramming an ambulance that the Rock was in. Rocky just cut a simple promo on the match and the attack. Rock would challenge Hogan to finish off the Rock, tonight. NEW-NEW-NEW-NEW World Order. Hulk Hogan, Scott Hall, and Kevin Nash would make their way out, with their phat entrance. Hogan was getting some great heat off his comments towards the Rock. Great intensity by the Rock. "Who would have ever thought that the man with 24 inch pythons would have half inch testicles". Scott Hall would say that he's able to fight Rocky tonight, as Hogan will only fight the Rock at Wrestlemania. Crowd was very into this segment.
Maven/Al Snow took on the Undertaker in a handicapped match. Undertaker easily beat the two wrestlers, which was odd to squash them that bad with Tough Enough 2 currently going on. Undertaker would accept the Wrestlemania challenge, but on ONE condition: Ric Flair would have to beg for the match. Flair would run down, and the two would brawl for a while. The match is finally official...
Chris Jericho, wearing Triple H's old robe and having Triple H's old bag with him (Stephanie), came down to the ring. Kane would be his opponent. Remember Armageddon 2000, where the "Last Man Standing" match was supposed to elevate Jericho to the main event scene by defeating Kane? OK match, with Jericho winning when Kurt Angle ran in and hit a botched Angleslam on Kane. Note to Angle: Kane is one big motherfucker to lift. Afterward, Kane and Angle would brawl, and then Triple H would run down and attack Jericho. He was going to give Stephanie a pedigree, but Jericho saved her. Oh darn. I'd love to see Triple H hit a botched pedigree on Stephanie, thus damaging her face forever to keep her off television.
Cool scenes of the WWF Asian tour. Let's hope that the WWF tours Australia in the near future, too.
Oh lord, another arrest angle. Ric Flair was arrested for jacking a fan during the Undertaker/Flair brawl. That dirty Undertaker appeared to be behind the whole thing.
Backstage, Kane is looking for Kurt Angle. Angle would ambush Kane, and then try to injure Kane with a garage door. How many injury spots will be performed on WWF television anymore? Kane and Angle have sick chemistry together.
Stacy Kiebler took on Lita. It was short, as I won't complain about that. Cool pinning situation set up by Lita. Lilian Garcia would ask Lita what her next move was, and before she could say she was going after the Women's Title, Stacy wanted to fight more. After pounding Stacy, DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY Jazz ran down and attacked Jazz. Ok, let's see these ladies put on a good match at Wrestlemania to shut up naysayers, like myself.
Oh man, I'll need an ambulance sent over here because my sides hurt from laughing at the Stephanie-Triple H car segment (sarcasm). Someone with acting experience needs to teach that bitch Stephanie how to act, because she didn't quite look like she was crying.
Main event time, with Scott Hall vs. the Rock. Wow, a year ago, you'd never think to ever see this match. Is that "Kliq" on the back of Hall's tights? If Hogan is going to make a full scale comeback as a wrestler, he'll need to make his punches look harder. He was barely touching Rocky's ribs. Hall and the Rock have similar punches. Rock would Rock-bottom Scott Hall, only to get a bad case of NWO run-in. After beating down the Rock a little, Steve Austin would make his way down to the ring and clear the ring. Afterward, Vince McMahon would book Austin/Rock vs. the NWO match for RAW. Interesting... Hall vs. Rock wasn't bad until the NWO interference greatly occurred.
LAST WORD: Not much in the way of matches tonight, but it was good on hyping the upcoming RAW and Wrestlemania. Wrestlemania was in trouble, thanks to Rock's hectic schedule and the Asian tour, but this show built some good storylines to lead up to Wrestlemania. I'll give it a
And speaking of that physical challenge... some will say that's wrong to do to the wrestlers, but hey, if someone wants to prove that they are "tough enough", then they'll bust their ass in any kind of contest.
I can't say much about the women, other than what happened with Jesse. She was apparently HAVING FUN while training, and because SHE ENJOYED training to be a wrestler, she was set aside by Ivory and told to change herself or else. Huh? The comments made by Ivory were quite strange, considering what side of the fence she's on.
Nothing really noteworthy on the first show, other than Aaron blacking out from the physical challenge, despite bumping the best in the ring. Aaron, too, needs to get rid of the problem that Josh had from Tough Enough 1: stop being pussy-whipped!
LAST WORD: Interesting starter show, as next week, things will apparently start to happen in the ring, as seen from the "scenes from next week's show" promo.
AOL Instant Messenger: BookerTito - It's recommended that you send your questions or feedback as your first message so that it could be answered, instead of saying "hi", "hey", "what's up" or whatever else. Just get to the point, please, to make it easier since I get drilled with messages.
WRESTLEPALOOZA.com - Audio Show, Columns, News, and more!
KOLTERSHOCK!!! - A site that you shouldn't view with small children present!
X-Entertainment.com - One of the most entertaining pages on the net!
@That's all for today. If time permits, I'll try to do a weekend column. If not, sorry, as I'll see everyone Monday. Just chill...
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.