On the eve of my 1 Year of Consecutive columns, it's time to do some Monday Night Impressions. While the WWF was still scrambling to set up Wrestlemania, WCW had their spring break edition of Nitro. I felt that it was a very interesting night of wrestling, with lots of oddities happening in both. All of this and more in today's Phat Daily Column!

But first...Thanks once again to whoever brought "Mr. Tito for President" sign which was on Monday Night RAW. This makes #14 for me.

You guys know what, I love it when you bring Mr. Tito and PDC signs to Raw, Nitro, Thunder, Smackdown and every other wrestling tv show, but if you guys do bring Mr. Tito signs, don't forget to bring a LordsofPain.net sign too or add it on the sign so that other people will know where to find the Phat Daily Column. Thanks!

Monday Night Impressions

NITRO

The edition of Nitro baffled me. What the hell is Hogan trying to do? First off, he is plugging Vampiro to be the "future of wrestling", and then Hogan challenges the Wall for a match. During that very match, Vampiro saved Hogan! What the hell? Is Hogan trying to work with the younger guys? Well, I think that he was doing it to prove something. If the ratings are low, Hogan will turn around and say that it was working with the young guys that caused his segments to have low ratings. Just you wait! By the way, that main event was horrible! Wall can't carry Hogan through a match!

Nitro did have some pretty good matches this week. Sting/Vampiro vs. Flair/Package was pretty good, as I was hoping that somebody would have been thrown into a pool somewhere. I've never seen wrestling go all the way out to the ocean, as both Sting and Luger were brawling there. Sting defeated Luger with a piledriver on the shore, and that was funny.

Looks like a little Russo influence was here tonight, as Mean Gene was using his dirty old man gimmick again. I'm glad to see DDP back, but I'm mad to hear Jeff Jarrett do interviews. He used to have great mic skills, but now, he stutters and makes absolutely no sense. This has been two weeks straight that Jarrett has stunk up the place with his horrible interviews. Congrats to Mike Modest for defeating stupid Artist, which shows that Artist can now lose since his buddy Sullivan isn't booking no more! Did Modest win the title though? The announcers made no mention of it, and he wasn't handed the title. Modest finished the Artists with a pretty damn good move!

Hey, I guess the old bookers haven't left just yet. Once again, Booker T had to do the job, and this time to a non-charasmatic Harris boy. I'm getting sick and tired of seeing him job every damn week, as I'd imagine Coolbeans is too. He is forced to put over the biggest jokes in WCW, and never given the chance to shine anymore. All I can say is that Russo better change this! Speaking of Booker T towards Russo, did anybody else feel moved by Booker's words about the lockerroom in that interview? Damn!

Jung Dragons are a pretty good trio. It's like a very good Kaienti. La Parka will never be given a chance to shine... Damn, Funk took a stiff powerbomb on the sand. Hey, since Hugh Morris is getting somewhat pushed, why not have his old man come out again!! It would be such wonderful fun!!! Hey, Chris Candido was at Nitro!

As for the announcement of Russo and Eric Bischoff. Damn Shiavone had such a hard-on from it this evening, even though some rumors say that Russo wants Shiavone off Nitro. Anyway, I'll be convinced that they've done a decent job when wrestlers like Booker T start moving up. Until then, they are just as bad as Nash and Sullivan at booking or running the show. Just don't bring on another NWO, please.

Nitro Phat Stats

Matches: 8
Clean Wins: 4
Screwjobs: 2
Disqualifications: 1
No Contests: 1

Last Word: Well, Russo and Bischoff have a LOT of cleaning up to do for this federation to even have a chance anymore. Tonight proved what NOT to do with your federation, and that means do NOT push the Wall and do NOT spotlight Hogan. You could do so much more, and poor Russo and Bischoff don't have the midcard power like they did when the Radicals were still around. That will hurt them, but if they are SO good, then they can work around this. I'll give this show a

C

again this week for some signs of decency, but yet the same old crap that can make this show an eyesore to watch. I predict maybe a 2.2 in the head to head battle with RAW.

RAW is WAR

Oh my God, another opening interview...this time with a long part of Linda only! ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ, oh wait, some brawling at the end. Yay. I liked the first match of RAW with Benoit/Guerrero versus Chyna/Jericho. I wish I could find that shirt that had "Eddy Guerrero is my Favorite Wrestler" on it like he made Chavo wear. Anyway, good screwjob during this match. Those Crash Holly skits get more looney every week! I'd run out too if I was in Road Dogg position!

Wow, the Radical tag teams are tearing up tonight, as Saturn/Malenko defeated the Hardy Boyz(of course it was a screwjob!). Phew! I thought Kane would have to JOB to Kurt Angle..but for some reason, I don't think I'd mind as much. Angle grows on me more and more each week. Oh boy! First you form the most uncharasmatic team ever, T & A, and now you've got to put them in a Wrestlemania match! JOY! JOY! JOY!

Again, Bossman/Bull will face D'Lo/Godfather at Wrestlemania. Any other lame wrestlers you care to tag up for Wrestlemania? What to be more excited? Looks like we now have Moolah/Terri vs. Kat/Mae Young. I hope to God, in that match, that Mae doesn't show us her puppies like she did for Royal Rumble. I have no idea what the point of the X-Pac and Devon match was for.

Did anybody else notice how lame Big Show was coming down to his Aggression theme? Anyway, Vince and Shane really love to put a hurting on each other. You know this takes guts to do as owners and leaders of a company. They are out there busting their asses when they obviously don't have to. Great main event match up here, with the crowd into it and the wrestlers or performers doing a great job as usual. You know, WCW could learn a lot from matches like this instead of the Wall and Hogan.

RAW Phat Stats

Matches: 9
Clean Wins: 3
Screwjobs: 3
Disqualifications: 1
No Contests: 2

Last Word: This RAW sort of dragged at times, and had very sloppy set ups for Wrestlemania. In my opinion, this show just gets a

B

for a lot of bad WM hype. They will defeat and pound on WCW, once again, in head to head action with a 6.1 rating.

Overall, an OK night of Wrestling.

Other Wrestling Stuff

-ECW on TNN got a 0.8 rating for their last show. Hey, what holiday can we blame this week for the LOW ratings? Huh, whatcha gonna do? I will continually blame that darned NCAA tournament, just like last week, for the repeated 0.8 rating. Looks like my St. Patrick's day/Christmas analogy wasn't too bad of an idea. I'll save my major bashing until the tournament is over, which is next week. ECW on TNN better shoot up on the ratings in 2 weeks to prove that it was all the NCAA's fault. Oh wait, we'll probably have some fictional holiday in two weeks to blame..oh, my bad.

-From what I'm hearing, it will seem, in two weeks, like all of the current WCW angles were all a bad dream. It will be just like the show DALLAS, as if Russo and Bischoff's absences were only a bad dream. I really hope that they do that because the current storylines are so half-assed and ridiculous. The current WCW has guys who just got done feuding, teaming up with each other. There are storylines where guys who can't draw a dime are being put over future superstars. Hopefully, Russo and Bischoff are the answer, just as long as they don't form or push another NWO. :)

-Rumors of Shiavone being taken off of Nitro are floating around. Madden's job, they say, is safe, although I don't know why because he has a bad appearance on camera and is terribly high pitched on his color commentary. I say have the NEW Nitro hosts as Scott Hudson and Bobby "the Brain" Heenan. Do you remember when Shiavone took a few weeks off? Hudson took his place, and there was some damn good commentating! Shiavone was said to have been very helpful producing the commentary during that period, so why not utilize him there? Hudson is, in my opinion, the best WCW announcer they have, but yet he does Saturday Night. I'm pleading with you on this on WCW!

@That's all I need to say. Unless some freak accident happens, a power failure of my whole area, nerve damage to my hands, or whatever problems could arise, I WILL be here tomorrow to complete 1 year of consecutive columns tomorrow. So I'll see you tomorrow! One More day until 1 year of consecutive columns!

Phat Farm: NEW "Hindsight" to Read...so CLICK HERE!

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading Everyday.

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