Yo, you're dealing with Mr. Tito. Ahhh, shoot. I must never use that introduction again. Welcome to the Phat Daily Column. Today, we'll sort of look at Smackdown, as you'll find out below, and we'll review Tough Enough as well. Lots of WWF material, out there, on Thursdays now.
Today, I'll be typing with a dislocated right thumb, which makes it fun to strike the space bar. I injured it playing hockey, yesterday, when I tried to pokecheck someone as they were going for a slap shot. It knocked the play off balance, and their stick hit mine ackwardly, thus dislocating my thumb. I'd use my left thumb, but man, that doesn't feel right whatsoever. I'll just suck it up and take the pain for today.
Anyway, on to the PDC.
Thanks to my horrible UPN and a bitch of a thunderstorm yesterday, I got nothing but fuzz when I tried to tape Smackdown, with the exception of the last commercial break and the main event. Our UPN is a pile of shit out here, anyway, for it always oddly gets fuzz when WWF Smackdown is on, but it's clear for most other shows. When there's a thunderstorm, the already crappy signal purposely sent down from wherever UPN 19 is located gets worse, thus screwing me totally. Now, I have to FORCE myself to either watch Livewire or Superstars; two shows I absolutely hate. I really wanted to see TAKA vs. Tajiri, and especially, the Rhyno/Angle/Edge/Christian interview. That had to have been funny.
The main event of Smackdown, Chris Jericho/Chris Benoit vs. the Dudleys was a very intriguing match up. I suppose from previous actions with Spike, the Dudleys are leaning towards being full blow heels, and from none of the "sports entertainment" actions like saying "WASSSSSUPPPPP" or "D'Von.................... Get the Tables!" were present. This match was a good one overall, and I predicted Steve Austin would run in, if this match would occur. He did, and the Dudleys reign as World Champs, once again. Since Austin helped the Dudleys, it sure wouldn't hurt to form a stable there. The combination of Steve Austin and the Dudleys, acting like total assholes, would create an awesome force in the WWF for the heels. It sure makes a lot of sense.
Finally, we are treated to a very strange Steve Austin and Vince McMahon segment. Lately, it just seems that all Vince McMahon involvement in the storylines has been absolutely pathetic. Then, we get Steve Austin trying to hug Vince, again? Come on, that's just f'n ridiculous. If Austin goes for a kiss on Vince McMahon, I'll stop watching wrestling. Knowing the WWF, they'll actually do this, since I'm not exactly on the top of their list in terms of favorite independent internet columnists.
No grade, because UPN 19 sucks.
Tough Enough
Overall, I pretty much enjoyed this show. The first show was just the audition part, and I laughed my ass off at some of the applicants either cheaply acting like a WWF superstar, or using a gimmick made up by their own creative ways. I liked seeing the WWF board, consisting of a few WWF talent scouts, Tazz, Al Snow, and Jackie messing with the competitors, and in Tazz's case, screaming at them. The WWF superstars have a great case in that they worked for years to even get into the WWF. These amateurs are getting the chance of a lifetime, that many in the independents would die for. Speaking of that, if I was an independent wrestler, I'd apply to Tough Enough. Hell, they could take the pain and bumps that the WWF will be giving them in the upcoming weeks.
I laughed my ass off when Tazz ran in and yelled at everyone in the waiting room. What many forget is that Tazz was one of the guys who ran the ECW House of Hardcore, and I've read reports that Tazz put future ECW wrestlers through hell there. Looks like the WWF picked the right guy for the job here.
Of the, what, 13 contestants chosen, it doesn't appear that any of the males chosen will even cut it in the WWF. They just look to short, and the guys who are taller, just don't look like wrestlers. However, on the women's site, they have one gem that I'm pulling for. The tall blond, who I think it named Pauline (I could be wrong). She just looks like a tough women's wrestler, and with a lot of training, she'd be good for the WWF women's division. Of course, what is that division when Chyna hasn't been on WWF television since she defeated Lita, cleanly, at a Pay Per View?
A few other things. I also found it funny, like that one contestant, that all of the women were wearing very revealing clothing for their tryouts. But hey, a few of them did hook the WWF judges, so I guess it really worked. That chick from Britain, by the way, looked like she was hiding two midgets. I was also amazed at how some people were badly failing just basic stuff in the wrestling ring. How hard is it to jumprope? Now I could see some problems with the bouncy ring, but to fail completely at it? Then, they had to jump over this punching bag, back and forth. God, some people just couldn't do it. Finally, the tryouts had to run back and forth, touching the bottom ropes of the ring. It's pathetic how some can't accomplish that.
But what really amazed me was the first test for the 25 or so finalists. They gave each contestant a drug test, and oddly after that, many of the competitors dropped like flies! You know, if I was in this competition, and I was that close to possibly getting a shot with the WWF, I'd feel very ashamed if I did drugs and the WWF busted me for it. Apparently, nobody told the finalists that Scott Hall like wrestlers won't be accepted in the WWF anymore.
I enjoyed most of this show, but I didn't like the Real World appeal it somewhat had when they weren't in a WWF facility. Like the interviews with the contestants and when they were in the house, etc. I guess that's what you get with Mtv's production, as I'll just enjoy the wrestling part, when the WWF staff just beats the living shit out of these 13 contestants. The previews for next week's show really makes me want to tune in.
LAST WORD: Although I do NOT like reality based series, I'll probably enjoy this one because I'm always intrigued by the training of professional wrestlers, because they take massive beatings. These 13 poor contestants will get murdered, and that's Must See TV. But a word of notice to all Tazz fans: WATCH THIS SHOW. Just from this first show, it's apparent that Tazz is going to be a total badass, just like a lot of ECW fans have been craving from him in the WWF. So even if you don't like reality television, why not watch this show for Tazz? It's hard to grade reality based shows, but I'll grade the whole show, overall, once the season ends.
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@That's all for today. I really wish I could have seen all of Smackdown, for I could have done a much better job for you today. Sorry. I'll be back tomorrow with a Week in Review column, I hope, since it could be hard with a lack of seeing one show.
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