Welcome folks, to another beloved edition of the Phat Daily Column. With the WWF now back on track after taking a few weeks off, it's time to get back to normal for everything. Hopefully, I can get back to normal, as I worked most of the days in December. Going back to school is good for something.

Oh, and it's time to explain some confusion over this website's name. Not only are we LordsofPain.net, but we are also WrestlingHeadlines.com as well. Calvin, the greatest webmaster that he is, saw an opportunity to buy a really nice domain name in WrestlingHeadlines.com and he took it. It's figured that WrestlingHeadlines.com would be much easier to remember than LordsofPain.net for first time viewers.

But either way, it's still the same great website. Calvin still runs the show, and William, Blake, the great results crew, and our Columnists will still bring you great wrestling content, day in and day out. It just has two different names, or just made a nice business move with the WrestlingHeadlines.com domain name.

So I hope that puts to end any confusion, if you will... For today's column, we'll review Smackdown because that's what I do on Friday. So on to the PDC, with it probably being the last ever on the famous Compaq from Hell.

SMACKDOWN is TITO

If the WWF wanted to prove how manly they are, then they should include ALL of the lyrics to Marilyn Manson's "Beautiful People" in their intro. I mean, the WWF already goofed on religion on RAW a few weeks ago when Booker T and Steve Austin chased each other in a church, so why not include the rest of the lyrics to define who the "Beautiful People" are?

We start out with an opening match, which was the same as the last edition of Smackdown, I believe. The Dudleys beat Spike Dudley and Tazz in an OK match. Not as good as last week's bout, though. Still no reason why Tazz and Spike are teaming up, other than ECW roots. Even then, Spike wasn't an Alliance member. Nice finish to the match, as Bubba Ray destroyed Spike with a top rope powerbomb. And for the Tazz marks... hey, he just wrestled for the Tag Titles.

Decent promo cutting by Jazz backstage, as she was interviewed by Lilian Garcia. It helped to add some heat to her when she fought Molly Holly later on in the night, but the Women's Division is so pathetic and boring right now for anybody to really give two shits about it. Michael Cole would say that Vince McMahon personally brought back Jazz for the Women's division, but that was it in terms of building Jazz's character for the fans to care.

Hey, a Vince McMahon in ring promo. That's NEVER EVER done on WWF television. Nope. The fans only enjoy saying "What" at WWF events right now, and Vince played off that by threatening to shut down Smackdown if they kept saying it. Vince turned off all of the lights, and then Steve Austin's music hit. Lights came on, and Austin was right there. Booker T and Big Bossman came down to help Vince, leading to a 3 on 1 attack, where Bossman brutally pounded Austin with a microphone. Rocky should have saved the day here, leading to Austin's help toward the Rock meaningless, unless this is used for future build up, possibly Rock vs. Austin, the 3rd Wrestlemania match (oh no!!!).

Looks like we MAY see a Canadian Foursome between Chris Jericho, Christian, Lance Storm, and Test. That would probably work like the 4 Horsemen. Make Christian and Storm a lethal tag team, like Tully and Arn, make Test a whatever singles competitor, like Barry Windham and Luger once played, and have Jericho play the role of the protected World Champion, just like Flair. Hmmm.... we could be on to something here.

Test's acting roles would make porn stars look good. Test would hit on Torrie Wilson, thus setting up a match against Tajiri. Oh boy, we haven't used *that* formula before. Test would, of course, win the match, although it doesn't really serve much purpose for any long term stuff for Test. Oh wait, he'll be pushed to the moon very soon. Thanks Shane.

Big Show versus Undertaker was an alright match, although hitting each other with trashcans is NOT hardcore. I could take shots to the head with those thin sheet-metal or whatever trash cans. I didn't know who to cheer for in the match, either? One is grossly overweight, while the other one is old.

I won't even comment on the Stephanie-Gate Guard-Billy Gunn & Chuck Palumbo segment. Stupid, stupid, stupid. More on Stephanie in a second... Looks like the WWF is going full force with the homosexual mentions with Billy Gunn and Palumbo. Just remember that WCW tried that with Lenny Lane and Lodi, and had some angry homosexual organization yelling at Time Warner for having wrestlers portray themselves as gay. The WWF has enough bad publicity as it is to add another group to the fold.

Next match was Edge/Rob Van Dam against Chris Jericho/Kurt Angle. Good tag team bout, as it wins this show's Match of the Night honors. The finish made the match, as Edge hit the Edgecution DDT on Jericho, but was Angle-slammed to lose the match. So who is feuding with who now, involving all 4 of these guys? How many more times will Edge and Angle fight? Are RVD and Y2J going to have one more match before the Rumble? It's like RVD is playing Roddy Piper, back when Piper was going after Ric Flair when he initially came into the WWF in 1991.

Jesus Christ, can't anybody see the obvious? Stephanie McMahon just CRAVES the television exposure. She can't be off WWF television for more than a month because she loves being the star. No need to have any confidence in the wrestlers, who are better talkers and actors than her anyway. But hey, she writes the shows, and it's her ignorance that can hurt the WWF product, as if she hasn't done that already. Ric Flair did an in ring promo to which Stephanie made her way to the ring, and actually slapped Flair. So a 3rd power has arrived in the WWF? I thought it would be just a battle between Vince and Flair, instead of Flair fighting a side war with Stephanie while getting ready for a match against Vince at Royal Rumble. But that makes total sense to Stephanie, who is mad with power right now.

Not a bad Rock promo, but certainly not his best recently. I don't really see any fun in ripping on Johnathan Coachman, like it was for Michael Cole.

The Main Event was Rock vs. Booker T for the #1 Contender's spot at Royal Rumble 2002. The match was decent, but overbooked at the ending, where the Rock pulled out the clean victory, despite Bossman trying to interfere. Yeah, that's good for Steve Austin: have Rocky beat his Royal Rumble opponent cleanly. After the match, Booker T and Bossman attacked the Rock and laid him out before Steve Austin, bandaged and all, would make the save. Booker T, however, had a chair in store for Austin, and Booker T and Bossman walked away, with the 2 big faces laying in the ring. RAW Main Event: Booker T/Bossman versus Rock/Austin. SMELL THE RATINGS!

SMACKDOWN Phat Stats
Matches: 6
Clean Wins: 6
Screwjobs: 0
No Contests: 0
Disqualifications: 0

LAST WORD: Wow, all clean finishes. In Dave Meltzer's Tributes, I liked reading on how Giant Baba booked nothing but Clean Win victories for his All Japan promotion. I wish someone would always do the same in the WWF. The wrestling was decent overall, but the "sports entertainment" was quite poor, especially anything involving Stephanie McMahon, who loves herself too much. I'll give it a generous

B-

(B Minus) for this week's show. I did like the emphasis of pushing the Triple H return throughout the show. Too bad his return means EVEN MORE Stephanie on RAW or Smackdown. Oh boy.

AOL Instant Messenger: BookerTito - It's recommended that you send your questions or feedback as your first message so that it could be answered, instead of saying "hi", "hey", "what's up" or whatever else. Just get to the point, please, to make it easier since I get drilled with messages.

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KOLTERSHOCK!!! - A site that you shouldn't view with small children present!

@That's all for today, folks. I'll have more for you some time this weekend, hopefully coming off a new computer. Ah, can't wait. Until then, just chill......

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.

Mr. Tito © 1998 - 2002 Exclusive to LordsofPain.net/WrestlingHeadlines.com