Welcome to the Phat Daily Column. I'm stressing today since the morons at the Computer Center here in OU can't keep the Novell software from crashing. Yeah, and they claim they are computer experts. So today, I'm coming to you from the laptop, which doesn't require the Novell software to use the server. Easily, the best investment I've ever made.

Lots of interesting feedback in the mailbox about the XFL and how the WWF will manage themselves with the season on going. Well, I bet you that Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler will be exhausted on Pay Per View weekends, by doing an XFL broadcast, a Pay Per View, and RAW is WAR... and let's not forget that Lawler does Smackdown, also(that's why Heenan or Gertner would make a good WWF pick up). But oh well.

Before we get to the column today, let's go through a few myths that some of you just LOVE to use in reference to me. Shall we?

1. The "Mr. Tito" name is JUST A GIMMICK! I said it before "I got the name from WATCHING the Jackson 5 movie on VH1, and added "Mr." to it". A lot of you ignorant people keep referring to me as if I were from Mexico, or if I was an African American. Well, I'm as white as a ghost, so you can keep trying weak racial slurs against me. I should just use my real name just so many would shut the hell up.

2. I don't spend all night and day on my columns. If you think that writing columns is THE ONLY THING IN LIFE THAT I DO, well then, you are stupid. If you look at the times I post the column, it's around anywhere from 9 am to 1 pm, depending on my college schedule or if I need some sleep. I don't spend all day researching it, either. I spend, on average, about an hour writing this very column, and about another hour, spread out throughout the day, working through emails or whatever else, and otherwise, I just keep my eye on the LoP main page.

3. I get a lot of shit about only watching wrestling. Well, look at what is on TV today. ALL OF THE SHOWS SUCK! I don't like a single thing that's on TV, today, except for wrestling, which is on 3 days a week. While everyone else enjoys other shows or whatever, I watch wrestling, and normally don't watch much TV during the nights when wrestling isn't on. The only shows I even watch, other than wrestling, are professional football games (weekends), Oz (on HBO, 10pm Sundays), and now TV Funhouse, which I watch by flipping during Thunder. I don't care for a single show on NBC, ABC, CBS, or FOX or anything else.

Good lord! On to the PDC!


-Mtv Heat-

I finally caught Mtv Heat for the first time in a while, since I hate the channel of Mtv, period, and something really bothered me. During the show, they had an angle with Dean Malenko and Lita. Well, before he was able to talk to Lita, he did something that I felt was degrading.

Malenko was the "visiting" superstar at WWF NY, and in the back, he got on the phone. There, he ordered two HOOKERS!! Now I know that the Godfather was a walking pimp, but I thought that gimmick was done away with and the WWF was going to keep out trashy angles like that. Instead, on Heat, Malenko ordered HOOKERS to come pleasure him at WWF NY.

On Mtv, a network mostly watched by Teeny Boppers who would go down on N'Sync if they saw them in person, is this the type of material you'd want on a show? Better yet, it would even be more degrading on RAW or Smackdown. You'd figure that after a few lawsuit threats, the WWF would realize that some kids start living their lifes in attempt to imitate the wrestling stars. I'm not saying that ALL will go order HOOKERS, but some might grow up with the attitude that it's ok to lower yourself into buying sex.

It's a bad example set by the WWF, as I thought most of the filth was eliminated. Apparently not, as we saw from last night on Heat. They should know better than that by now.

-RAW Hype-

Tonight's RAW comes from the Georgia Dome in Atlanta, GA. You know what's funny? Last time the WWF was in that very arena, they were bragging about how many tickets they sold. They've been rather quiet this time around... Hmmm... The WWF better work hard to put on a good show, in front of a group who grew up on the WCW style of wrestling.

Oh no!! Triple H and Steve Austin can't touch each other (which I wouldn't want them to, ewwww), or they will be suspended for 6 Long Months. Just imagine how many wrestlers would flourish if one of those two would get suspended... OOPS, the Rock would still be around. My bad.

We've got 3 long weeks before No Way Out, so expect a very slow RAW, with a lot of XFL hype.


-Nitro Hype-

Gasp! We're going to see a Power Struggle between Ric Flair and the Cat. Honestly, will that rake in the ratings? I'm not trying to be mean here, but I've seen enough talking between the two. LET'S SEE THEM WRESTLE! How about that? Flair was taking the bumps last week from Dusty, so he's ready.

Brian Adams vs. Buff Bagwell: Oh wow, I really want to see these two performers wrestle against each other. But in all honestly, I'm beginning to like their tag teams, KroniK and Totally Buff. This match stems from Brian Clarke getting injured from Thunder, and the shocking upset by Totally Buff in that tag match. This match will be bad, indeed, but it keeps an interesting feud going. Totally Buff, in agreeing with Dr. Shaft who writes Ban the Legdrop at the Pharm, is becoming a good duo together. Both are way too big of headcases alone, but together, they are very funny.

Rick Steiner vs. Shane Douglas, again: I fear a title change here, bigtime! Rick Steiner is getting the slow push to the top again, as he does everytime when Eric Bischoff is in charge. That's the DAMN TRUTH! I'm thinking that someone from the NEW WCW, possibly Jeff Jarrett, will help Shane get a win. At least I hope so.

No other matches booked though. Probably something with Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash, I'd imagine. Maybe Nash might have to fight someone else for the #1 spot, again? Who knows? I'm sure we'll see some good Cruiserweight matches. That division is getting stacked, bigtime!

NEWS ORGY: The Truth about George W. Bush and Al Gore, NEW Music Rant, 3 Recent Movie Reviews, and MUCH MORE!! So CLICK HERE to Join the Orgy!

Wrestle Palooza Audio Show

LoP T-Shirts: NEW STUFF IN STOCK! Mouse Pads, Sweat Shirts, Coffee Mugs, more T-Shirts, Baby Doll shirts, and more! Also, you can now order via Credit Card!!!

FREE Lordsofpain.net E-Mail Accounts!

@That's all for today. Be sure, for those who are ignorant, to look over the myths on the top of the column. Read them closely so that you can stop being stupid already. How about those apples? Until tomorrow's column, check out the Unspoken Word!

Phat Pharm: NEW "Unspoken Word", so CLICK HERE to Read It!!!!!

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading Everyday. I mean it!

Mr. Tito 1998 - 2001 Exclusive to LordsofPain.net

The XFL Gazette

-According to WrestlingObserver.com, the Las Vegas vs. NY/NJ gained a strong 10.3 rating in the overnights. The rating helped NBC win the night for television, and it was higher than the movies that NBC normally had on Saturday nights, which got around 4.2. Although it is the first night of the XFL, it is a very strong start. Vince was actually thinking that just getting a rating of 3, 4, or 5 would be strong.

-I didn't catch the Los Angeles/San Francisco game, but the most of the online feedback on the game came out very good. Many football fans were very entertained by the game, and are very willing to watch next week's games. I think the first night soured some people's opinion of the XFL, since it was a 19-0 game. The latest game was close, and good, competitive games always gain interest.

-It appears that RAW will have something on the XFL, so if you couldn't get enough, check it out tonight!

-The XFL execs and Vince McMahon are happy that Vegas is betting on the XFL games. To be a legit league, it's usually thought that it only becomes one once bets are placed on the game at Vegas.


Los Angeles: 13
San Francisco: 15

Memphis: 22
Birmingham: 20

League Standings

Orlando: 1-0
Birmingham: 0-1
Chicago: 0-1
NY/NJ: 0-1

Las Vegas: 1-0
Memphis: 1-0
San Francisco: 1-0
Los Angeles: 0-1


Saturday: Chicago at Los Angeles; San Francisco at Orlando

Sunday: Birmingham vs. NY/NJ; Las Vegas at Memphis

To learn more about the XFL, then Click Here.

Overall, many are satisfied with the XFL, thus far. Vince McMahon better hope that this enjoyment continues, and is not just the first week excitement.