Welcome to the wonderful Tuesday edition of the Phat Daily Column. You know what that means...the dreaded Monday Night Impressions are here and ready for some honest criticism. Why? Cause I don't mark or shill for NOBODY. Both shows put up what they thought was their best effort, and it's time for the gradebook to come out, so on to the PDC.

Monday Night Impressions

WCW Monday Nitro

Tank Abbott vs. Sid...what can I say? WCW built it up pretty good, and Tank put over Sid!!!! Holy Crap! He tapped out in the crossface as well. A former UFC fighter submitted in a very weak crossface to a guy who can play softball better than he can wrestle. I'm shocked, and it made for a good main event.

Sting came out, did you hear the crowd go crazy??? He's the most over guy in WCW, still, so push him now that he's back!!!! He gets louder pops than Hulk Hogan does now, so just do it! How can you avoid it? Of course, this IS WCW, the land of missed opportunities, like the Kidman vs. Booker T match. They really disappointed me on that one, so the chances of getting an A dropped when this went down. Also, it's rather funny how a guy who came into WCW last fall, gets the US title, and wins just about every match that he's in. Of course, this is Jeff Jarrett we are talking about, as he should be going after the World Title, and dropping the US title for other guys, who WCW refuses to push, to wrestle over.

I'm loving the fact that 3 Count is the hardcore champ. Why? Because no selling Brian Knobbs doesn't have it. I don't know what WCW was thinking during the Mamalukes vs. Idol and Lane match. Let me see here...push somebody who is over like Norman Smiley, or push a has-been named Dustin Rhodes. This is WCW silly, so we'll push the has-been. Somebody put Crowbar on the announcing team, FULL TIME. Maestro, who nobody cares about, defeats the Cat. Argh! Curt Hennig returned, only to job to Flair. Form the Horsemen, I beg of you! Buff is a waste of television time anymore.

NITRO Phat Stats

Matches: 10
Clean Wins: 7
Screwjobs: 1
Disqualifications: 1
No Contests: 1

Last Word: Well, this was a pretty good show except for the fact that WCW politics are still showing. Lord only knows that Booker T and Billy Kidman can put on a show, but yet the crackers in the back just can't realize it. Damn shame too. Overall, this was the best Nitro that I've seen for a while. They did well for what they had, and I respect that. Therefore, a good, solid

B-

for WCW this week. WWF had a commercial during the Tank-Sid match, so the ratings will be HUGE there. I expect WCW to pull something around a 2.7 in head to head action. I'm giving props to TNT tonight, because they did one hell of a move. They put the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit special up against the second hour of RAW!

WWF RAW is WAR

Everyone knows that I F'N hate RAW opening interviews, but for some reason, I really liked this week's. Probably because Triple H and company was dogging the Rock. "This is an A and B conversation, so C your way out of it" or something of that nature by Triple H! I love it! Stupid decision by McMahons to allow the Rock one more shot. What were they thinking? Oh wait, Rock had to pin either HHH or Big Show. Notice the word "pin", because Shane ran in and the match ended up as a DQ. That's funny stuff. I also loved seeing the Brooklyn Brawler come back! It was nice of the WWF to use him this way. He fought the biggest man in their profession, after years of putting over midcarders.

Wow, the Hardy Boys beat the Acolytes fairly. Hardys have come a long way! Kurt Angle couldn't stand an ass in his face, so what could have been a great match was ended. Damn. Then it's run-in city, as everyone in their mother came down for another one of those "fun" brawls. Hey, at least the dancing at the end was funny. I'll save my Too Cool bashing material for another day because they didn't wrestle any matches last night. Lucky them. >:)

I love Headcheese! Just making fun of Steve Blackman with no charisma is so great! I'm still in awe that Christian and Edge are #1 contenders. Not to bash their talent, but why not have the Hardys in their place? Good match with Saturn and Jericho, as they had some classic matches in WCW. Why does the WWF make Mark Henry so stupid? WWF, once again, dropped the ball on Tazz. Tazz and Chris Benoit could have put on the best match in a long time, but noooo, fucking Bossman and Prince Albert came down to NO HEAT WHATSOEVER and attack Tazz. Terrible, simply terrible. Wow, DX turned on Mr. Ass. Shocking!

RAW Phat Stats

Matches: 9
Clean Wins: 4
Screwjobs: 1
Disqualifications: 2
No Contests: 2

Last Word: Not a bad RAW, but not a great one either. This show only makes you have to tune into another show to see if Rock will go on to Wrestlemania, and whatever angles leading up to Wrestlemania. They have 5 weeks to go, so I somewhat understand. They are truly messing up with Tazz right now. I'll give it a

B+

for this week. Due to the pay per view, viewers will watch a lot of the first hour, which is head to head with Nitro, and the ratings will be high. I'm predicting a 6.4 for the first hour.

Overall, a fairly good night of wrestling.

An Apology: If you read my column Sunday, you'll notice that there is a lot missing from my predictions. I went 3-5 in my predictions, which proves, once again, that I'm only human. I like to take chances anyway. :)

Other Wrestling Stuff

-ECW on TNN had a 1.1 for their past show, which pretty much seems like they will NOT defeat the lower-end shows like Livewire, Saturday Night, and Superstars. 1.1...that's only 0.2 better than their opening night of 0.9. Gee, they've really improved in the ratings, haven't they? People keep getting on me for dogging this issue, when they don't know how right the facts are. ECW has advertisements, they have Acclaim getting the word out, and it's been 6 months since their original show came out! Do you see my point yet? I guess not when all some people do is eat and breathe ECW. I hope that the prediction by Rob Van Dam and Joey Styles means that ECW will overtake WCW...in a few months, because it sure as hell doesn't look like it will happen anytime soon!

-PWtorch.com reported that Goldberg isn't contacting WCW about anything, as he won't return their calls, and so forth. I guess he's joining Bret Hart in the hold out until WCW gets their head on straight. Goldberg holding out to help out WCW in any way is such a joke. When he's held out for more money, WCW gave in to him twice, and paid him the money that he wanted. They made him into an instant superstar, and the best he can repay them is by refusing all contact? That's very sad, as I hope that WCW starts fining his candyass for it. Now does everyone see why I always bash Goldberg when I get the chance?

@That's all I have for today, as I need to really catch up on e-mail. I'm so far behind on e-mail right now, as I'm very sorry for that if any of you have anything really important sent to me. So have a nice day, and remember that fact that everybody has opinions. Speaking of opinions, I'm hoping to have a review of N64's ECW Hardcore Revolution tomorrow. See you then!

Phat Farm: It's So damn Fantastic!

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.

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