Welcome to the Friday edition of the Phat Daily Column. I am humbled to be writing a PDC today, for I didn't know if I could find an internet connection. Why? Today, I'm at a different campus taking a standardized exam, which is a requirement to possibly get into graduate school. Looking around the university, I found some computers that aren't protected by Network Administrators. You'll find at a lot of High Schools and Universities, the "boss" of the computer lab will rig Internet Explorer so that you can't delete history or any traces that you browsed on the internet. In this case, I need to erase the history of my posting url for this very column, which I am able to on this very computer.


Phew! I thought I'd have to save this column for Saturday. Instead, it comes at a regular time as I abuse use this computer lab to type the PDC. It's funny to see stressed students besides me, working on projects for their classes while I'm writing a F'N wrestling column. I'd like to rub it in their faces, but I don't want kicked out of the lab...


Couple things in the wrestling world I found interesting... Joanie Laurer or "Chyna" was turned down for the role in Terminator 3. AWWWWW, poor Joanie. I'm sure there will be an excuse, as there always is, why she didn't get the role. Why doesn't Joanie accept that she can't act, nor can she talk properly. Just accept it! Then, accept the fact that she wasn't worth all of the money she asked for when her WWF contract came up last year. I'll put money on it, before it's said and done, that she'll BEG the WWF to be a part of Wrestlemania.


On a few message boards, I've seen many blame news sources such as Dave Meltzer, Wade Keller, Dave Scherer, and others as painting a bad picture on the internet about Scott Hall, Hulk Hogan, and Kevin Nash. The blaim comes from the reports of Scott Hall acting up at recent WWF tapings. Well, just put it this way... the news sources that the news generates from are either wrestlers or employees within the WWF giving out information. Obviously, they are just stating what they see, and it's apparent that the WWF locker room is sort of tense. Many have felt the wrath of Hogan, Hall, and Nash, and they know those 3 could ruin what they worked hard for in the WWF over the past few years. Taking a look at recent commentaries or interviews by WWF wrestlers, they have all basically challenged the NWO wrestlers to work hard or don't waste the WWF's time. That shows you that there's something going on behind the scenes that creates political fear within the WWF.


Several individuals have been ragging on me for the 2 NES reviews of the WWF games, saying I'm way too negative when grading them. No, they are that bad. None of the other wrestling games have a computer wrestler mindlessly wondering around the ring, and with such a limited move selection. Besides, don't worry too much, because I've got 2 more WWF games to review on the NES, so things could become better (at least for one of the games). I'll be reviewing the incredible Tecmo NES wrestling game on Monday...


I don't believe ANYONE should downgrade the recent 3rd Quarter revenue results, as posted by the WWF. Sure, they lost revenue, but during this corner, the WWF signed some top name talent, will increase the house show circuit, finally resigned a deal with DirecTV, and have made several million dollars worth of roster or work force cuts. Wrestlemania, too, is right around the corner, and that will give the WWF an added push as well. My feeling on the success of the WWF in 2002 all depends on 2 things: avoiding a Summer drought like 2001 and the creation/pushing of new talent. The Summer of 2001 provided us with the extremely lame Undertaker/Kane vs. Austin/Triple H feud, that presented embarrassing buyrates and killed the Wrestlemania 17 momentum, when it shouldn't have. The WWF split needs to be a success on giving wrestling viewers some new faces to grasp and enjoy, like many of the OVW guys.


Speaking of OVW, my buddy Krueges let me borrow a tape of the September television shows for that federation. My opinion on that is if you like the old school style of wrestling, like the smaller arenas and psychology, then OVW is for you. I liked parts of it, and in turn, there were several parts that were, eh, strange. But damn, there's some awesome talent there, though. Especially on looks. Randy Orton, Brock Lesnar, and Leviathan look like larger than life superstars in the making. Lots of great midcarder stuff, too, with guys like Prototype and Rico Constantino. It's odd to hear Jim Cornette as a face announcer, too. Overall, though, I'd recommend looking into this federation, if you haven't had the chance. Don't ask where to get OVW tapes, though, for I have no idea.


And finally, I picked up the Kurt Angle bobble-head (or rumble-head) the other day. For some reason or another, I'm slowly getting addicted to bobble-heads, as I've bought a good 4 of them in the last 2 weeks. I picked Angle over the Rock and Chris Jericho... But damn, the WWF bobble-heads are much heavier than the other ones, and their heads don't "bobble" as much. It's like the Kurt Angle bobble-head has the same think neck attached to its head just like the real Kurt Angle.


Oh, and by the way... this year's Winter Olympics is the best in recent memory. Lots of great competition and the Hockey is F'N spectacular! Much better than the NHL. That's way off the subject, but I really wanted to say that. GO USA in tonight's match against Russia!


Anyway, I don't want to stay in this computer lab forever today, so on to the PDC.


SMACKDOWN is TITO


And speaking of Kurt Angle... Kurt Angle was our opening promo, as acting like Austin on RAW, he called anyone from the back to come get some. Kane answered the call, as we could have witnessed a 3rd good match from these two in a row. However, it quickly went to the outside, where Angle disqualified himself. What will this accomplish? Man, we could have had a hot opener. Hopefully, this may set up a bout at Wrestlemania between the two, where it could be yet another good match from this pair. Angle needs someone to wrestle for that event, ya know....


You know, I really like this conflict between Ric Flair and the Undertaker. Best thing the Undertaker has done in years, and it could really help his heel status. Nice of the 'Taker to mention the Horsemen, as well. I'd like to see Flair vs. 'Taker at Wrestlemania, no lie.


Why did Smackdown show that LONG recap of what the NWO has done thus far? I can understand highlights, but nearly the whole RAW segment? Please....


The New World Order would come out and read apologies from a written statement. Kinda goofy, if you ask me. The segment involved mostly reading, and finally with Hogan saying that the apology will mean nothing when he kicks the Rock's ass at Wrestlemania. Good of Hogan to mention that the Rock hit him first, too. Steve Austin would then interrupt the segment, though, and begin the chaos that would go throughout the night.


The first match was Christian versus Edge. Yikes, this could have been a hot Wrestlemania match. Instead, it's likely to be Regal vs. Edge 736746645363. Can't wait, eh? Kind of a short match, although the new Edge submission was pushed again. Damn, that's an awesome leglock! It looks like you can't even move when it's locked in. Christian would declare that he was "quitting" the WWF after the match. Huh?


For all of the Steve Austin-Scott Hall segments, it was like the WWF was toying with some shooting on Hall. Austin kept repeatedly asking Hall for a beer, made fun of his education, and then, Jerry Lawler made the comment when Austin was gave Hall a beer in the ring, "Oh no, don't fall off the wagon" or something to that effect. It seemed as though Austin was really into yelling at Hall, too.


Digression: you know what would make Scott Hall look cool as a wrestler? Put the little razors back on his tights! I mean, you could make white and black tights, but only style them the way he had his tights in the WWF on his first time there. That would look badass.


Rob Van Dam/Hardys vs. Dudleys/Lance Storm was next. Exactly why this was booked, well, I don't know. Match was OK, but it had a spectacular finish! Spot after spot was hit, with RVD finishing Storm off with a 5-star Froggy Splash were he adjusted in mid air to perfectly hit Storm off to the side. You could just see the crowd erupting for the chaotic finish. The WWF needs more of that. They could also use a 5+ minute match between Lance Storm and Rob Van Dam to really turn some heads.


Stephanie would enter Ric Flair's room, insisting that the RAW move was just wrong. Oh boo hoo. She'd hear a toilet flush (but no handsink, ewwww), and assumed that Arn Anderson was taking a MASSIVE Horseman shit. Nope, it was Triple H, and he said "life's a bitch, and then you marry one". HA! Too bad he'll likely get back together with Stephanie at Wrestlemania. I'm calling it now!


Our next match of the night was Chuck and Billy versus Tazz and Spike Dudley. Before we rip on Chuck & Suck for, you know, sucking, let's point out something obvious. What did Chuck and Billy do to gain a Tag Team Title shot? The APA had to win a Turmoil match just to gain a shot at Wrestelmania. Secondly, take a look at William Regal and Chris Jericho. Both guys continually wrestle "non title" matches because the WWF wants to save the "title" matches for the Pay Per Views. Oh, so Spike and Tazz can't do that? Aside from ripping on Chuck and Billy's ability as a team, they did NOTHING to earn a title shot, nor was there any angle for Tazz and Spike to offer these guys a shot on a television show. It makes no sense. This aside, Chuck and Billy are the NEW tag champions. They practically squashed Tazz and Spike for the titles, too, which flushes that title run of 2 solid months down the drain. Again, all ripping on Chuck and Billy aside, I don't know if I could get excited for an APA vs. Chuck/Billy match for the Tag Titles at the biggest show of them all. Don't be surprised if the HUGE Toronto crowd gets quiet for that match. I knew this would be only a matter of moments before Chuck & Suck would win those titles. So sad.


No need for Chris Jericho to generate his own heat with Triple H. We must make Stephanie the center of all attention! I guess we could say "fuck it", since Hogan vs. the Rock will be the main focus, anyway. Jericho did piss off a lot of fans by saying he never meant all of those putdowns on Stephanie. He should have given her a big smooch to really draw some heat.


The Main Event was Undertaker vs. Triple H... OOOOPS, it wasn't. Jericho attacked Triple H before the match could happen, and the Undertaker said hell with the match, and drove away on his motorcycle. Ouch, I can just hear my grade dropping for this show. I guess Undertaker did this in response to Flair, like a smack in the face to him? It was a smack in the face to WWF viewers for not delivering a hyped match.


Our final segment was Hall getting embarrassed by Stone Cold. Could be a good match at Wrestlemania, given Hall's motivation.


LAST WORD: As far as entertaining, the show was watchable. However, it had its share of short matches or promised matches going bad, which downgrades the show in my gradebook, if that matters. I'll give it a generous

B-

(B minus). Wrestlemania is looking better by the day, too, with the exception of the World Tag Title match. Let's see what we've got...


-Hogan vs. the Rock
-Steve Austin vs. Scott Hall
-Undertaker vs. Ric Flair
-Triple H vs. Chris Jericho
-Chuck & Suck vs. the APA


Other than the tag match, we've got some great big name matches thus far. Just imagine if they add Kane vs. Kurt Angle and a good match involving Rob Van Dam, too. Come on March 17th!


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@That's all for today. I'm not sure if a weekend column will show its face, but I'll try. I work the weekends, which in turn, burns me out badly. Until next time, just chill till the next episode.


Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.

Mr. Tito 1998 - 2002 Exclusive to LordsofPain.net