Welcome back to the Phat Daily Column. Last night, we witnessed a very strange edition of Monday Night RAW, which I'll review in the PDC today. A lot of strange McMahon stuff, let me tell you that much.
Good feedback on the Wrestlemania NES game. Everyone pretty much agreed that the gameplay for it lacked a great deal of depth, even for its time. It's just Acclaim, as I've said it for years.... they half-ass gameplay in hopes of juicing up the graphics. I guess if you like graphics, then Acclaim is your favorite gaming company, but for gameplay, try another gaming company. It's funny how much the THQ WWF games are loved, as compared the Acclaim WWF games.
Tomorrow, I'll review the first and only WCW game for the NES. That's one of the more overlooked games in wrestling history, and it's oddly overshadowed by the WWF NES games. Why? Back in 1989, the WWF's fans were much younger, as the older wrestling fans who didn't play video games watched the NWA/WCW. That's just how it was....
Anyway, I want to get into RAW, so on to the PDC!
We open up RAW with the Undertaker coming out to do an in ring promo. Wow, I can just hear those ratings decreasing. I got a good laugh out of the face pop the Undertaker received as he came out. Can we say bad idea on the heel turn? Ric Flair would come out in hopes of saving the ratings, but didn't do so, as reviving a poor Undertaker segment is the hardest thing to do in life. Flair would then announce that the Undertaker would be facing Steve Austin, later that night. Oh boy, what a joy for us all: an overdone match. Remember when the Undertaker vs. Austin Smackdown match, from a few months ago, was considered the "best Smackdown match" ever by the WWF announcers?
Our first match of the night was Chris Jericho vs. Edge. Any reasons for these random matches pitting superstars against Jericho? None. Oh wait, they are all "non title", so it's ok to not have any logic around it. Hmmm, Jericho seems to use those title belts to beat everyone anymore. Match was OK, but nothing really special. Every guy Jericho seems to fight, aside from Austin or the Rock, has a lot of credibility lost from jobbing to the top tier names in the last few months. Edge should be doing something with William Regal, to you know, hype a Pay Per View match.
Next match was Goldust vs. Rikishi. Yuck, what a poor match this was. Neither guy is truly over at this point, with just a few of Rikishi's moves getting pops right now. Poor Rob Van Dam is almost the most popular WWF wrestler right now, and he's being whored out to Goldust to gain interest in that washed up wrestler again. It's so funny that the WWF can't see their own faults and what wrestlers truly suck on their Smackdowns or RAWs.
What? What? What? What? It must be so much fun to say it in a live WWF crowd, but watching it on television? Yecch!
Our next match was Kurt Angle vs. Godfather. Wow... what the hell does this add to Angle's fight against Triple H? Exactly. Instead of hyping a Pay Per View match, Stephanie McMahon wrote herself into a brand new angle with her husband, Triple H. It's only millions of dollars we're talking about.
Undertaker vs. Steve Austin was unfortunately next. Remember when this match was a big deal in 1998? Exactly, and that was over 3 years ago. A lot has changed since then. Boring match between the two, and it ended in yet another DQ finish. Austin had Undertaker beat, though, which makes me wonder if Austin has anything against the Rock right now. I mean, Austin has made a few of the Rock's opponents look really bad lately before their Pay Per View match. Like Jericho... Speaking of Jericho, he was the man who ended this sorry match and beatdown Austin after the match. Jericho??!? Giving someone else a beatdown?!? That sure is a first.
Next, it was Booker T vs. Tazz. Quick and sloppy match here, as I guess it's apparent that we'll see Booker T/Test vs. Tazz/Spike Dudley at No Way Out. Booker and Test got no heel heat after the match, thanks to countless times both guys were built up only to get embarrassed by the top guys. I highly doubt that Booker T and Test will win those titles, for it's likely that we'll see Chuck & Suck winning the titles at Wrestlemania. Oh God, that would be painful.
Wow! The Dudleys were given some mic time! Well, just stupid mic time from WWF NY, which is meaningless because they probably won't have a Pay Per View match this month.
Torrie Wilson vs. Stacy Kiebler was next, as it was a bikini match. Those two fought one of these before, and it was basically a carbon copy of what we saw before. Both look damn good in bikinis, but neither can work a match. And like I've said many times before: they should sell magazines, pictures, or calendars, but not wrestling moves.
Odd segment with Mr Perfect and the chess player. It was sooooo 1980's, it was pathetic. Why can't the WWF just use Mr. Perfect to build up Main Eventers, like Rocky, Triple H, or Stone Cold and to create possible dream matches? Not happening, because the WWF gets stupid when there's no competition on another channel.
To continue our trend of matches booked for NO reason, Rob Van Dam took on Christian. It was an OK television match, but why was it booked? After RVD got the win, Goldust popped on the Titantron to remind us of the embarrassing Pay Per View match, where RVD's flashy moves will be the only thing of interest in the bout.
Onto the weird........ Vince McMahon would meet Stephanie backstage, and announce that even though she tried to run him out of business, he was going to escort her out to the renewing of the vows. But in this segment, Vincent K. McMahon checked out his own daughter!!!!! Oh my gosh, that's sick and disgusting in soo many ways! I know those things are big, gigantic, and damn near popping out of the dress (which they would later), but good lord, checking her out on national television? Yuck! I guess that's why the WWF can't run the company well anymore: they are inbred!
As for the ceremony... It had nice drama to it. As for as me wanting to see it, I could have cared less. The whole time, though, you were waiting for Triple H to go off on Stephanie, even through the shitty singers hired to sing. I guess this segment reunited Stephanie and Vince, more than likely, as I laugh at how long it took this time. It probably catapults Triple H into a big face position, but it damn near does nothing for his match at No Way Out.
RAW Phat Stats
Clean Wins: 3
No Contests: 0
LAST WORD: Leave it to Stephanie to divert attention away from the Pay Per View, including the big returns of Hogan, Hall, and Nash, to herself on the RAW before the Pay Per View. It wouldn't put it past me that Stephanie could actually ruin the NWO's WWF debut. Not at all. Horrible show!
AOL Instant Messenger: BookerTito - It's recommended that you send your questions or feedback as your first message so that it could be answered, instead of saying "hi", "hey", "what's up" or whatever else. Just get to the point, please, to make it easier since I get drilled with messages.
WRESTLEPALOOZA.com - Audio Show, Columns, News, and more!
KOLTERSHOCK!!! - A site that you shouldn't view with small children present!
X-Entertainment.com - One of the most entertaining pages on the net!
@I hate Stephanie McMahon. She's the WORST thing to happen to the WWF. It's funny how the success of the WWF just slowly decreased as her role increased. Isn't it ironic? Nope, it's the damn fact. Tomorrow, I'll review the WCW game for the NES and shove some Daily Apples down your throats. Until then...
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.