Welcome to another delightful Phat Daily Column. Today, we discuss the wonderful shows known as RAW and Nitro. Together, those are the shows that make up the Monday Night Wars. Now, with RAW, they had Armageddon to hype up, and as the law of Tito about RAWs says, these RAWs usually suck. Nitro is two weeks away before their Pay Per View, so who knows what we are supposed to get? We shall look into these two super shows, so on to the PDC.

But first........

And Second.....

Thanks to Ryan Wild for the RAW sign, and another thanks to him for now holding up 3 signs for LoP and myself! Also, thanks to whoever held up the "Tito PDC" sign at Nitro as well. #51 and #52 in one night. It's very much appreciated.

NITRO

First off, I have no idea what WCW was trying to accomplish with Ed Ferrara at the beginning of the show. Sure, it's cheap heat in Nebraska, but who gives a flying fuck at home in other places, for example, Ohio? Oddly enough, it set up for Sid to get arrested.

I'm glad to see Chavo Guerrero is now on his own, and he got a clean win over Kwee Wee. WCW is either breaking him away from the MIA for a strong push, OR, they broke him away because his contract runs out very soon. Let's hope his contract runs out so that he may jump to the WWF.

Nice of WCW to give Crowbar bad matches the second he becomes Hardcore Champion. Also, I don't quite care for any feud involving the Cat, especially when good wrestlers like Shane Douglas and Lance Storm must waste a Pay Per View with him. But hey, I guess they'd have to fight Rection instead?

The Lex Luger interview was WAY TOO LONG!!! WCW broke rule #435, and that is to NEVER give Luger extended amounts of mic time. Shame on them.

Good match with the Insiders and 3 Count. When you get a caring Nash, a usual DDP, and the two solid guys from 3 Count, I guess good matches can happen! Nice of Mike Sanders to make an extended "Dusty finish" by reversing the Mayhem match, and then giving the World Tag Titles to the Perfect Event. It's like a Florida Recount!

KroniK needs to stop acting like the APA, and fast!

Thank God Scott Steiner nailed Norman Smiley so that our time wouldn't be wasted on Bill Goldberg squashing him. Instead, M.I. Smooth(get it??) was sent into the ring instead. Nothing worth noting except for that Smooth sold the spear like a bitch! Now that's how you make a move look extra violent!

Jeff Jarrett carried lazy Konnan to a decent match, I guess, but I don't really care for the Harris Boys involvement. Why doesn't someone just sweep that team under a rug already? Jarrett is still willing to work with midcarders. That's why Jarrett gets the pushes, and you don't Mr. Buff Bagwell.

The General Rection vs. Scott Steiner was bad, but better than expected. I liked the ending of Nitro, with everyone running down. Odd how Sid saves the day for Arn Anderson...

NITRO Phat Stats

Matches: 7
Clean Wins: 5
Screwjobs: 1
Disqualifications: 1
No Contests: 0

Last Word: A so-so night for Nitro. Stuff like having the Luger interview, Ed Ferrara, and nonsense segments like with Reno and company hurt this show. It had a good ending though, and a pretty good match with the Insiders and 3 Count. I'll give it a

C+

for a lack of a real spark in this show. WCW needs some kind of angle that everyone can get attached to, and what they have now is no where near that. I predict a 2.1 for the second hour.

RAW is WAR

Finally.... the Rock has done a great interview for the first time in a long time!!! His interview had me in tears from laughing, and that says a lot because I usually hate the repetitive crap that he says. Here, he was fresh and he tried to be funny with his great imitations. Now that's how you do a Rock segment. That interview is a keeper!

Oh, and by the way........ FINGER OF SHAME to Jerry "the King" Lawler for dogging Al Gore all night long. If I wanted to hear political views, I'd turn off RAW and watch CNN or FOX News for that kind of stuff. Now I could see maybe mentioning it every once in a while, but saying it all night long is just too much for a wrestling program. That's not especially good for anyone who supports Gore's cause for the recounts, because it might stop them from watching again, thanks to Lawler. Lawler should call up Bill Maher on ABC's Politically Incorrect if he wants to express his opinions on that stuff on television.

RAW starts off with Undertaker against Rikishi. Well, give the WWF credit for trying to do a "hot opener", although the guys used are sooo slow!!! Match surprisingly ended with a Rikishi win over the Undertaker. Shocking!

Ok, what's with the booking on the Dudley Boyz? That confused me, because for one, they are the MOST OVER tag team in the WWF right now, and for two, they've been feuding with the RTC forever now. I guess the WWF wants the RTC to finally have some heat by having their top tag team joining them? If it's a swerve by the Dudleys, then why on Earth did they screw the Hardys out of the titles? Of course, they've feuded with the Hardys for so long. I'm expecting the Dudleys to turn on RTC, and to quickly set up a title match at Armageddon where they will finally get the World Titles again. I hope at least, and then set up another brutal feud with the Hardys?

All I can say is that Edge/Christian made Road Dogg/K-Kwick look like fools last night. Their insults just KILLED them beyond belief, and E/C too had me in tears from laughing. K-Kwick and Road Dogg deserve it too because their gimmick sucks that bad! Edge's new finisher just reeks of awesomeness... I mean looks devastating.

Yeah, for those of you who yelled at me for dogging Hardcore Holly the other day, look who made who look good last night, and look who got the easy win. Oh, that's Chris Benoit! Benoit better win the title at Armageddon, because as that horrible match with Val Venis showed, Billy Gunn is a horrible wrestler. It's funny, because Billy Gunn has everything that Benoit doesn't have, and vice versa. Now if Benoit only had the charisma, then damn, he'd be on top of the WWF that easily.

The stuff with Dean Malenko and Lita is classic, and I'm glad it's giving Malenko some direction within the company. Now if they could only do something for Perry Saturn........... But anyway, Malenko was just brutal with Lita during the match, and easily slapped on the Texas Cloverleaf for the win. Nice of the WWF, however, to steal a page out of older booking notebooks, with Lita now being forced to a date with Malenko.

Hot match with Chris Jericho and Kurt Angle, with Jericho almost getting the win. Now, Jericho will get depushed again, making both himself and Angle looking bad. Oh no, we just can't make Jericho look good, even though the crowd just loves the man.

By the way, is referee Teddy Long going to turn evil again? That was the original plan when the WWF picked him up off WCW waivers. If you remember, Teddy Long was a referee for WCW, WAY back in the day, where he turned heel and eventually managed the rough team of Doom.

Good thing Steven Regal won his title back, but bad thing he has to fight another boring Holly. Blah. Molly got hers for ruining Regals match at WWF Rebellion this past Saturday, with Regal giving her some domestic violence that the PTC will gladly complain about.

"Oh look at me!!! I'm Vince McMahon!!! My Ego is soooooooooo big that I must be on the whole show of RAW because I *think* I'll draw ratings. In fact, I'll just have a nice, long interview section with myself instead of a main event on RAW. I LOVE myself to death!!"

Says Vince. Yep, good old Vince McMahon was all over the show tonight, and even killing off a main event to showcase himself. In fact, I did like him taking the 3 faces' finishers, BUT McMahon's ego is just swelling since it's showing that he'll take one for the company. I actually hope the ratings drop for this show just to shove it in his face!

By the way..... William Regal vs. Crash Holly was indeed the main event.

RAW Phat Stats

Matches: 8
Clean Wins: 7
Screwjobs: 0
Disqualifications: 1
No Contests: 0

Last Word: This was a great show other than too much McMahon and the Val Venis vs. Billy Gunn match. Those two things alone can totally hurt a show. I'll give it a

B

for those two reasons, with McMahon being a main one. Vince himself isn't a ratings draw, but good booking with Vince certainly is. I predict a 4.8 for the first hour.

Titoisms

-Somebody better teach Ivory how to hit someone without actually hurting someone. Those punches she gave Chyna were the WORST ever, as she was just tapping her neck when acting like she was punching her in the face. Nice of the WWF cameraman to pick it all up too!

-Why in the hell did I waste my time reading Bill Goldberg's book, when Lex Luger read the majority of the book in his interview last night?

-Didn't Kevin Kelly look like Elmer Fudd when the Rock put the Stone Cold hat on him? I thought for sure that Kelly would turn to the camera and say that he was hunting "wabbits".

-Since Jeff Jarrett attacked an innocent person on a football field at the beginning of Nitro, could Jarrett face some assault charges? I'd think so?

-Looks like Hardcore Holly will now have the All American Lex Luger gimmick of having a loaded steal arm. He nailed Chris Benoit with it last night, and knocked Benoit out with it. Hey, Holly has always needed a finisher, and the flying metal-plated forarm could make him as great as Lex Luger was in the WWF. Maybe he could tour on a bus too?

-I wonder if WCW read my column yesterday about Norman Smiley getting a match with Bill Goldberg, since Smiley was destroyed and replaced with M.I. Smooth.

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@Sorry for the lateness of this column, but I had to watch both of these shows very late last night. Plus, the Tuesday PDC always takes forever to type up! Just chill........

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