Welcome back to the Phat Daily Column. With Christmas only 10 days away, wrestling is just filling us with joy(sarcasm). The gift of 2 failing promotions and a large ego in a successful one is upon us, so we must enjoy what is given to us. Today is WWF Day, which means that Smackdown gets aimed, and that I'll give you my views on current issues or news and to give the Jackson 5 of the top 5 WWF wrestlers. Now can you dig that?


You're a mean one.... Mr. McMahon.

Almost too mean, as you try soooo hard to put yourself over as a dickhead boss, who cares for nobody. He's putting himself over, totally, and he's now doing it by making his own family look bad. In fact, I can't believe he didn't see his own ego when he was looking into the mirror.

But hey, I don't like it whatsoever, BUT, it is drawing ratings. That won't stop me from ranting on it. Vince took up the most air time, followed by the Kurt Angle interview. What Vince really needs to do is to start involving himself in the wrestler's lives, and to NOT put himself over in his own evil world. But if this is what the owner of the company thinks is best for the WWF, then fine, keep doing it. We'll just see how great it actually will be in the long run.

Smackdown actually started off good, with a "non title" tag match between Edge/Christian and the Dudleys. E/C got the cheap win, though, in a non-title match, which was rather odd. I have no idea where this feud will go, but I'm sure garbage like T&A, Lo Down, or other wannabe teams will enter to make it a clusterfuck of tag teams for a title match at Royal Rumble. It's the WWF, you know.

Dean Malenko is just pure evil, as he attacked Lita in her own Women's title match up. Hey, that's no way to treat the one you love. Later on, Malenko got on the mic, to a dead crowd response, and talked some stuff. Then, Chris Jericho came out, ripped on him to a huge response! Eddie Guerrero came down, and the fans totally forgot about the match at hand and started chanting "Eddie Sucks, Eddie Sucks.." Hello?!? Do you hear that Vince? A Chris Jericho vs. Eddie Guerrero is a money feud, even though it's happened before in the WWF. Jericho is hot as a face, and Eddie is getting tons of heat right now.

Wow, 3 bad matches, in one week, for "The Negative One" Billy Gunn. I'm impressed. Both Val Venis and Chris Benoit are legendary for making their opponents look good, but both Val and Chris had problems. No, they weren't dogging it... maybe it's that other performer, who the WWF has been shoving down our throats lately. Oh, what's that worthless talent's name? Oh yeah, Billy Gunn. Either depush him, or send him to some lower place to improve. He needs it, badly, and so do we, the fans.

I liked the booking for the Raven and Undertaker match. Raven could be used as a stronger jobber for the Main Eventers since Raven did have a decent position at WCW for a while, and most fans probably remember it. It's funny, though, that Raven attacked Bob Holly at Armageddon, and we haven't seen Holly get his revenge yet. How strange? I suppose Holly has been working hard in those Heat/Jakked matches, eh?

Odd finish to the Hardys vs. Perry Saturn/Chris Benoit match. Could it be setting up the singles turn for Jeff Hardy? That's what it looks like. I'm sure we'll see something on a newsboard out there "HUGE NEWS ON JEFF HARDY'S SINGLES CAREER" or something. The WWF might be doing something else with this loss on Benoit(not Saturn), so keep watching I suppose.

Hey.... another decent interview by the Rock. So.... that's what, 2 in 2 weeks? Impressive. Rock teamed up with Stone Cold Steve Austin, who took a break from listening to the Backstreet Boys, to face Steven Regal and Kurt Angle. Good main event match, with Regal jobbing via 2 stunners. I'm glad to see that Regal is getting some Main Event time to show what he has, and his teaming with Kurt Angle could be used for future purposes too. Just get Regal some new tights, please.

By the way, I really like the entrance theme for Smackdown. It's so original and fresh, and that's something that the WWF should try with RAW. I'm tired of hearing those same themes on RAW, as we have for about 3 years now. If they want to spice up RAW, that's a good idea, if you ask me.


You know what is going to happen with Billy Gunn??? Same thing as the last time he wrestled singles. Notice how the Road Dogg isn't quite working out well with K-Kwik? K-Kwik could be impressive, on his own, so a break up of that heatless team could happen soon. So what will the WWF resort to? The Road Dogg Jesse James! The Bad-Ass Billy Gunn..... the NEW AGE OUTLAWS!!!!! It's going to happen, since that's the only way the WWF can market Gunn or Dogg these days. Of course, Billy Gunn would have to get his old name back to reform this team. Give it a few weeks or months, and I guarantee you that it will happen!

I just LOVE how the WWF is bragging about RAW's high ratings on TNN this past Monday. That's just nice, as they had no WCW to compete with. Casual WCW fans jumped on over to the WWF, plus, the WWF was coming off a Pay Per View. So before you get cocky and brag, just await this Monday, when the competition returns.

The Royal Rumble is just around the corner, and you can just imagine that the Rumble itself will be loaded this year! You have Radicalz, Tazz if the WWF wants to, Raven, a BETTER Chris Jericho, MORE OVER Dudley Boyz, and much more to add to the Royal Rumble. Last year, we had a watered down Rumble, if you ask me, with some of the WWF's lowest talent entering that very ring. This year, it will be MUCH better.

Speaking of the Royal Rumble, it was at last year's event that Tazz finally arrived and choked Kurt Angle out. Approximately a year later, Angle is the WWF World Champion and Tazz is just a commentator on Sunday Night Heat. Now isn't that special?

WWF Jackson 5

5. Rock: Unlike Austin, he wrestled both TV shows.

4. Chris Benoit: Poor Benoit, as he's had to wrestle Gunn, twice, in one week. No man should endure that kind of punishment.

3. William Regal: Welcome to the main event sector!

2. Dean Malenko: The Great Malenko is on a hot streak! He finished out the elimination match at Armageddon, he was part of the winning team on RAW, and he defeated Jericho on Smackdown.

1. Kurt Angle: Big win at Armageddon, and Angle actually didn't get pinned this week on either TV show. Wow!

News Orgy: One Big Orgy of News!

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@That's it for today. I'll be back with some kind of History column. I don't know what yet, as that's what I'm doing after I write this column. If I can find something on the Eliminators, then I'll discuss that former great tag team, but if not, then I'll do some miscellaneous WWF topic. Just chill..

Phat Pharm: NEW "Gimmicks Die Hard" Column for You to Read, so CLICK HERE!

Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.

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