It's a beautiful day..... Welcome to the latest edition of the Phat Daily Column, the column that is free and doesn't beg you to pay subscription costs. Of course, who would spend money to read this thing? Even if there was demand to pay to read the PDC, I still wouldn't charge you folks at home. I don't write for the money.
Throughout the massive amounts of Instant Messages I received yesterday, many were saying "why don't you just get a new computer?". Sure, with a couple paychecks, I could easily buy one. However, just take an honest look at today's technology: it's just as flawed. The latest editions of Windows still have a ton of bugs in them, meaning that stuff will still crash or screw up. And I need Windows, because I have things like the Digital Camera, which only work with Windows. So for now, I guess the Compaq from Hell will just have to do, and it will be good, because many HATE hearing me complain about it.
Several of you have given me a GREAT idea about video games. Since I buy up NES or SNES games cheap all of the time, why not make an effort to buy ALL of the older wrestling games and review them in the PDC?!? That's an incredibly good idea, and I'll keep an eye out for any of the wrestling games that come cheap out there. I used to have WWF Wrestlemania for the NES, and RAW and Wrestlemania: The Arcade Game for SNES. Oh, and WWF Superstars for Gameboy, too.
I absolutely laugh at Macho Man Randy Savage's challenge to Hulk Hogan, which was his so-called "big announcement", as seen on another internet site. Not because it's for charity, oh no, but because that Macho Man would still job to Hulk Hogan, even if he set up the match himself!!! I kid, I kid... If Macho Man wants to make headlines in wrestling again, then he'll accept around $400,000 and make one final WWF run, instead of the millions he still requests.
And you know what I REALLY find funny? Former WWF wrestler Chyna has an issue of Playboy out there, and there isn't much buzz, online, about it. When the first issue hit, many wrestling sites tried to post her pictures, and all of the message boards wanted to see her nude, too. Now, nobody really cares, and I doubt that the issue is selling well, either. But it is the final moments of fame that we'll see from Joanie Laurer, because she won't make it big in XWF, nor will she ever be a promising actor.
Before we start getting nasty about Chyna, on to the PDC.
Anyway, Chris Jericho did cut a nice promo about being the World Champion, and then Ric Flair announced that Jericho would be fighting Austin in a steel cage. Right then and there, I thought Jericho's title reign would be over. Hey, is the WWF going to create a new title to signify an undisputed champion now?
First match of the night was Undertaker vs. Spike Dudley. I can see why they did the interview first, instead of this match. Like RVD vs. the Undertaker the other night, the match was just the Undertaker's opponent, this case being Spike, bumping around and selling everything for the Dead Man Walking. It's very funny how exposed the Undertaker is, every week, as a wrestler, but yet the WWF allows him to keep winning. Vicious bumps at the end by Spike.
It was funny to see the WWF experimenting with Angle's music for his entrance, and then changing it back once he beat down Rikishi. Oh, the next match was Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi, and it was a nothing match, really. Angle walked out of the match after almost getting stinkfaced. Angle tried to attack Rikishi while he was dancing, but ended up getting stinkfaced anyway. Then, Angle attacked again, but this time with a chair, and was successful. *Yawn* Angle and Rikishi have feuded before, and Rikishi isn't exactly over this time around to make it anything good.
Hilarious stuff from the Dudleys, as Bubba was "nervous" about fighting the undefeated team of Rock and Trish Stratus. Good segment to put heat on the Dudley Boys, as they should talk more often, damn it! The Anaheim crowd, though, would be pretty much silent for that tag team, later on.
Next match was Kane vs. William Regal. Before the match, Regal attacked Edge to continue their feud. For the match, I'd hope that a thick leather mask would take SOME of the brass knuckles, but oh well I guess. The WWF referees should insist on getting the WWF ring crew to check every part of the ring, announcer's table, railing, and floor for anything Regal tries to hide, like his brass knuckles. At least the WWF is pushing Regal as a dirty, filthy cheater, and doing a fine job of it, as they put him over Kane tonight.
Trish Stratus/Rock vs. Dudley Boys was next. Eh, it was an OK bout, I guess, as it was basically the Rock fighting for his life with worthless Trish (as a wrestler) on the outside. I remember seeing the backdrop by the Dudleys, on the Rock, and seeing how Rocky landed hard on his left knee, I believe, and thinking "oh damn, that must have hurt". That knee is apparently bruised, as news reports are now saying. The ending of the match was quite ridiculous, as it appears that we'll now see Rock vs. Test, as Test will be whored to get some heat off of the Rock, instead of getting it on his own. I can't believe that Vince tolerates letting Shane push his own friends, even at the expense of the company's top star. What a fool!
What could we do without a Vince McMahon interview? Tonight, he was up in the balcony, with the man, Booker T, and Vince announced that he has a new club, the Kick Your Ass Club. Jesus, how lame is this? Vince dogged Ric Flair, too, thus laying some sort of foundation for the big WWF split.
One of the better Hardys/Lita acting segments occurred, with Matt and Lita breaking up. However, it was far from good. Lita and Matt should apply for acting jobs in Pornos, because they act just like it!
Next match was Lita/Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy in a handicapped match, with the Hardys/Lita being handicapped when it comes to acting skills. Ok, I need to stop using that punchline when talking about handicapped matches. The match was strange, as the fans were seriously questioning who to cheer for. Oh wait, it's just Anaheim. My bad. But even if this was a hot crowd, silence would still occur because this storyline is so weird. Matt won after pinning Lita, and afterward, Lita did a poor crying job in the ring. Geesh. Hardys are great workers, but damn, get them some acting lessons, pronto!
Goofy stuff, all night, with Lance Storm asking for his job back. Storm would finally get his shot to come back, but it was against the Big Show. Joy. Big Show destroyed Storm, thus burying anything for whenever Storm does show up in the WWF again. You know that the WWF is just itching for Chris Benoit to return, just so he and Storm can do battle. Big Show is a total waste at this point, and he continues to be successful, despite always ignoring the WWF's pleads for him to lose weight. Oh wait, he's a friend of Shane's... Just like Test, he'll do what he wants.
The only moment that the Anaheim crowd really popped: the Steve Austin backstage interview. It shows you, right there, how truly over Austin is when he can get a whole arena of Anaheim fans popping.
The main event was Chris Jericho vs. Steve Austin. Decent bout, but the use of the cage just isn't what it used to be. The ending was kind of silly, too, as Jericho got the win, thanks to yet another interference by Booker T. Man, Booker T better have the feud of a lifetime with Steve Austin after 2 back to back incidents that screwed Austin out of the Unified Title.
RAW Phat Stats
Clean Wins: 3
No Contests: 1
LAST WORD: Yecch! What a dull night of wrestling. Part of it was from a quiet crowd, while some of it was from tired wrestlers, from giving it all the previous night. Also, the WWF writers seem to put their efforts into writing the Pay Per View, and then get burned out for the RAW afterward, since they book on the fly (or write storylines on the day of the shows). I'll give this show a generous
AOL Instant Messenger: BookerTito - It's recommended that you send your questions or feedback as your first message so that it could be answered, instead of saying "hi", "hey", "what's up" or whatever else. Just get to the point, please, to make it easier since I get drilled with messages.
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@That's all for today, kiddies. I hope to be back, tomorrow, with two Playstation 2 wrestling video game reviews of Smackdown: Just Bring It and Legends of Wrestling. Until then, just chill.....
Take Care, and Thanks a Million for Reading, daily.