Welcome to the latest edition of BaD TITO
That's right. An experiment has been done. Mr. Tito, the author of the Phat Daily Column, has gone mad!! He's full of rage, and his madness has been inflicted on anyone who reads this! Be afraid, be very afraid.
Ha, I'm just kidding. In some sense, however, I'm not. For the longest time now, I've just wanted to go off. In this very special weekly column, I will do that. How you ask? Let me show you how in my two segments which I will bring to you everyweek.
My first segment will be called 'Mail This'. That's right, as I get lots of mail which I will post up in this section. If I see an e-mail that either bothers me, or should be used for this column for some great comments by myself, I won't be afraid to use them. Don't worry though, I will always post the mail without your name and e-mail addresses, therefore, save your lawsuits for later. I get tons of e-mail from people claiming that I'm a mark. That would be a GREAT example for an e-mail for me to use/rip the hell out of. It's just good, wholesome entertainment.
My other segment is what I'll call 'Hate Me Now'. This is the real dark side of myself, as I won't afraid to rip any wrestler or anything involving wrestling out there. Usually, I try to refrain from ripping the hell out of a wrestler. Well, not here. Anything in wrestling that I can't stand, I won't be afraid to put it in this section. So if you are fans of the wrestlers that I normally bash in the Phat Daily Column, you just wait till you see what I have to say about them in this column.
I will also put a few views of the internet scene in this section. If I see something on the internet that bothers me, hell, I'll rip on it as well. Why not? Everyone else does it! Besides, what does internet life matter anyways?
Also in this section, I won't be afraid to say bad words. That absofuckinglutely right! This column is uncencored, unedited, so I can say whatever the fuck I want. Hehe. That's probably my favorite part of this. I haven't been able to truly go fucking crazy on any of my columns using any curse words. Ahh, I feel so much at home now that I can say HOLY SHIT, and feel good about it.
So where should I fucking start this week? Oh yeah. Sid. Yes, that's right. He's only been in WCW a few months, and already WCW makes Sting do a clean job to him. Granted, that WCW wants Sid to be over, but why have him defeat Sting Cleanly? Sting is the fucking franchise of WCW!! Have some WWF senior tour wrestler job to him cleanly to put him over, not Sting!! Have Nash job cleanly to him, since he's a damn pussy anymore. Of course, WCW's hero, Hulk Hogan can't job to him. Nooo....Eric Bischoff needs his fucking brownie points, but isn't he president?
Also, what the hell is up with WWF's weight loss program? They bitch at wrestlers like Big Show, Mark Henry, D-Lo, and Mideon, but not Viscera for losing weight. No offense to Viscera, but when he walks down the street, I'm sure everyone shouts: "God Damn it, that's one big fatass!!" (Credit: South Park) I mean come on, he's total fat. Easily, that heaviest wrestler in the WWF, so why not put his ass on the fucking treadmill? Also, if you are going to bitch about weight, why not bitch about Mick Foley. He isn't exactly in great shape these days either. But hey, he's a top star, he takes bumps, and he's a big draw, so I don't see the WWF bitching at him.
As for the internet scene. You know, I don't have much aggression about it today, but I will say this. There are WAY too much newsboards out there claiming that they have "exclusive news". Ha! Those many newsboards copy my PDC word for word, as well as other internet poster's news, who pay out their ass everyday on hotlines. That's what I hate truly, out of everything on the net. The damn copying and pasting. Does anyone have the balls to write their own stuff anymore? I see my column copied and pasted everywhere, claiming that my opinions are theirs. I see Hotline reports, either copied or rewrote, without proper credit, or the author claims it as their own. Why not use originality? In my opinion, it's the only way to go. So write your own stuff, or credit the stuff you take for the love of God.
So that's all I can muster up today for this brand spanking new WEEKLY column for the brand new section of LoP. I just wanted to do an introduction to let the readers know what they are in for. So until the first real edition of Bad Tito, chill till it!
Mr. Tito with an opinion
How ya Like me now, and how bout dem apples?