Welcome back to the Phat Daily Column, which is actually coming at you on a Thursday for a change. Didn't think you'd see the day, eh? Well anyway, today is the day when I finally finish up one of the classes that has been burning me out badly, so I should be more "daily" after today. At least that's what I think, because it's the Summertime and I like to get out every once in a while, if you don't mind.
I caught Mongo Steve McMichael on Sportscenter, as they did a news story on how the Chicago Cubs apologized to the umpire for what Mongo said to him over the P.A. system during the 7th inning stretch. I couldn't help myself but laugh because McMichael looks hideous these days. Now I don't ever like to rip on weight gains, but Mongo is now twice as big as he used to be. It was only about 3 years ago since we last saw him in professional wrestling, and he's lost all of his muscle tone and gained a good 100 pounds, possibly. It's quite frightening.
By the way, I read through all of the Planet of the Apes ending e-mails, and a lot of endings that were sent in made sense and some still didn't. Just going through the possibilities on how the ending from the first will shape up for the sequel now makes me want to see the second movie. Maybe I'll write up a small webpage of all of the ending possibilities and link them in a future PDC.
*Sniff, sniff* What's that I smell? Oh yeah, it's apples! On to the PDC.
-Oh my Gosh, I can't believe that the media is believing that Chyna has actually left wrestling to become an actress on her own. That's so ridiculous. Linda McMahon said so herself that Chyna had a high asking price and the WWF didn't feel Chyna was worth what she was asking to continue. Therefore, the WWF has decided to not sign her, and since Chyna can no longer work as a wrestler, because the WWF is a virtual monopoly now, she must attempt to become an actor. The way she's getting cheap publicity is to aim at the WWF by taking cheap shots at Triple H/Stephanie and claiming that she left wrestling to become an actress, instead of wrestling kicking her out so that she could become an actress. But this is Chyna we're talking about, the one who will lies through her teeth just to gain sympathy from you. Words don't express how happy I am to see her out of the WWF.
-I've been pointing out his stupidity for years... Good old Vince Russo has been apparently telling people that he plans on booking the Disco Inferno in a match against a boxing kangaroo for an upcoming Australian Pay Per View. My gosh, how insane is that? I knew that when Russo booked David Arquette to win the World Title in the most ridiculous fashion, ever, that he was really out of his mind, but after hearing this news, it makes me wonder if he was even present for when the WWF was becoming successful in 1998. I don't know what to think of this lunatic anymore...
I'm sure a lot of you are thinking: "Tito seems to really aim at Vince Russo, Chyna, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Eric Bischoff, and at times, Stephanie McMahon." Well, yeah, but if you really think about it, these individuals have a lot of stupidity in the wrestling business. For one, they are out for themselves, and could care less about those who surround them. Secondly, once they have some sort of power, they'll abuse it and make moronic decisions to ruin a company. Finally, each think they are invincible, and they'll try anything because they mostly think that their spot is protected, monetarily and through whatever connection they have. And I just call it like I see it.
SMACKDOWN HYPE!
After a subpar RAW this past Monday, as noted by many wrestling critics (I gave it a B minus), Smackdown will attempt to give viewers a plausable reason to buy Summerslam. Hell, I already have my reason, and that's to see Booker T vs. the Rock, even if the storyline is poor or botched later this week. Hell, the match might not happen because Booker T currently has a leg injury. D'oh, my one reason for wanting to see this show could be gone.
WWF.com is hyping a "HUGE six-man elimination bout" for tonight's Smackdown. It will be the team of Steve Austin and the Dudley Boyz, who are Alliance members but former WWF wrestlers too, and they'll fight against the team of Kurt Angle and the Hardy Boys. Now, I can understand the Austin vs. Angle booking, but why are the Hardys and Dudleys thrown in here? I really hope that the WWF especially finds a way to explain why Angle and the Hardys are teaming, cause the Dudleys are probably in this match because of their work in the RAW match.
Just note that the match should be good since it's an elimination type match, where the match ends when all of the competitors are defeated.
Next, we'll see Diamond Dallas Page and Kanyon take on the Acolytes. So what did Kanyon and DDP do to earn their title shots? Where have the APA been these past weeks, for they disappeared after their "big" win against O'Haire/Palumbo at Invasion? But just remember that logic seems to escape many of the current bookers or writers in the WWF these days, and that booking on the fly can produce some very strange things.
In a match that should be DAMN GOOD, Rob Van Dam will defend his Hardcore Title against the man they call Edge. Again, no storyline shown for this match, but at least the action in the ring will wake fans up. It will be funny, though, if RVD goes over Edge, because it will truly show how much the King of the Ring 2001 win was for Edge by having a red-hot ECW wrestler beat him. If this match is really given the time to develop, then it should be one to tape.
CAN YOU SMELL THE RATINGS?!?!?!? Raven, who isn't over as part of the Alliance, will take on Perry Saturn, who isn't over despite acting like a goofball. I can remember 4 years ago, when this match actually meant something. Saturn wanted to fight his way out of Raven's flock, and the two put on some good matches together. However, Raven is now older and Saturn lost a lot of his speed when he decided to bulk up like Superstar Billy Graham. I'm sure you could hear a pin drop during the crowd response for this match.
Other than these QUALITY matches, look for such characters as Booker T, Rock, Undertaker, and Chris Jericho to appear on the show. If you've already seen the overall match line up in William's Post, it looks to be a weak show for UPN this week. But who knows? It could be an overall entertaining night, and I'll watch in hopes of that. I just don't see the Alliance vs. the WWF feud being properly booked lately.
CLICK HERE to listen to the latest show, as the WrestlePalooza.com crew review the latest news in pro wrestling. Note that new Wrestle Palooza shows are produced every Sunday and Wednesday of the week. Be sure to check regularly for any announcements concerning possible guests on the show. Also, listen to the archives, which features interviews with Bobby "the Brain" Heenan, Harley Race, Daffney, Spike Dudley, Dr. Death, Dusty Rhodes, Lenny Lane, Kid Kash, Madusa, and more!
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Gamerave - The Ultimate Videogame Site: Reviews and Previews of Gameboy Advance games, along with information about future gaming systems!
@That's all for today's edition of the Phat Daily Column. I'll be back, tomorrow, with a full review of Smackdown and Tough Enough, if you can dig that.
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Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.
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