By Mr. Tito
Welcome back to the ONE and only Phat Daily Column. Yes that's right, the one and only, and it's filled with Monday Night Impressions. Just remember my promises about Nitro grades from the past few days, cause I intend to keep it! On to the PDC.

Monday Night Impressions

WCW Monday Nitro

-Oh joy, my favorite wrestler Chase Tatum vs. Mickey Whipwreck..two Saturday Night wrestlers..in hour one? Decent match until a worthless hype named Sid ruined it.

-Interesting situation with Luger coming back. I feel he's going to backstab someone!

-Hmm..Bischoff drove in with a Hummer. I suppose that answers it..he's turning bad!

-Wondering: What business did Luger have in the Cat-Buff match? Rather odd. Maybe he's keeping it real with former Wolfpac members.

-DDP and Goldberg...we gotta wait for next week..geesh!

-I gotta say this, but that Good Ol' Boys song really sucks!!!

-The Millennium man ruins another match. Hey, it's kinda funny how each person he jumps equals a win. So stupid. I have no idea why WCW is hyping Sid so much, because he simply doesn't have it anymore.

-Why is WCW making Rick Steiner ruin every match? He's in everything nowadays, and it's making me sick!

-ICP is impressing me everyweek, but that doesn't mean I'm marking out for them. I'm wondering if Shaggy is injured, because Uncle Eddie messed up from the top rope and cracked him good in the knee.

-Why is every match that Rick Steiner wrestle in so boring? He wrestles Benoit, who can put on a match, but Rick Steiner dragged it down. Argh!

-New tag champs!! I'm hoping this is an effort to make Booker T a singles wrestler again. He carries the team, and he can be a great singles asset if used right, eh Coolbeans?

-Vampiro vs. Uncle Eddy was pretty good match, but I was hoping it could be saved for the pay per view.

-Ah yes, Sting vs. Hogan....do I need to start cursing about Rick Steiner and Sid coming in? Hold on that thought, I'll save it for the conclusion and grade. :)

-KISS playing God of Thunder...I doubt it's a ratings grabber, and it will be hard to say if Bryan Adams gets over as Demon.

Nitro Phat Stats

Matches: 10
Clean Wins: 1
Screwjobs: 4
Sid coming down: 2
No Contest: 2
Disqualifications: 1

=====$$Alright, where do I start ranting..hmm. Ok first, here's what I said about Nitro Sunday: "If Steiner or Sid runs in on this Sting vs. Hogan match at the Las Vegas Nitro this Monday, I'm going to flunk Nitro, GUARANTEED!!!" Here's what I said Monday: "We have to see what happens in the Sting vs. Hogan match. I'm cheering for a match with a clean win, and no F'N Rick Steiner or Sid run ins. If that happens, instant F for Nitro. No lie." I don't mess around, nor do I Won't Make Promises I can't Keep!!! So for the millions..and I mean millions of disgrulted wrestling fans sick and tired of run-ins at the main event, Nitro gets a BIG FAT

F

for being so damn stupid. Why can't they grow balls and have a good ending to a main event? Why? Why not have at least a screwjob? Sid and Steiner suck! They shouldn't always run in, especially when two faces are wrestling!! It's ignorant, and I'm not putting up with it. I'm not a WWF mark by giving them an F, I'm just pissed of seeing Rick Steiner and/or Sid run in twice in a row!! It's pathetic, and I'm truly wondering if WCW thinks that they can attract viewers with that crap. The rest of the show was ok, but I gotta keep my promise. (Note, Nitro would have gotten around a C/C+ if they didn't drop the ball)

RAW is WAR

-What has Triple H become? He's a savage now, trying to do anything to get heel heat. He gets it already, so therefore, he doesn't need to go crazy and break J.R.'s arm!!

-That woman announcer was really horrible. Nothing against women, but that one was terrible!

-Gotta love no contests for Hardcore matches. Oh my God, Bossman stole Pepper! That just drags that worthless angle out, yay! Jericho and Road Dogg heating things up!

-Acolytes vs. Big Show and Undertaker. It just errupted into one big can of ass whip. Tag teams are strong in the WWF.

-Ack! I missed the Stevie segment!!

-I'm hoping D'Lo kills Mark Henry for selling him out. Mark Henry has his title too!

-Great to see Chyna fooling Mr. Ass on the open contract signing!

-Rock vs. Gangrel was just a normal Rock match, but I will say that Gangrel knows how to sell the shots. He made the Rock's moves look very good. Great point and angle about being held down for a title shot.

-I about spit out my Koolaid when Fink came out to the Ultimate Warrior's theme. Great double powerbomb by Jericho during that segment!

-Holly match was alright...but no ending to their fight..like last week. Doh!

-Darn Acolytes helped Mideon and Viscera, two losers, defeat my favorite team of X-Pac and Kane. Damn X-pac has been taking some bumps lately.

-Smashing segment with Jarrett/Chyna/Mr. Ass. Some mean guitar shots taken in that segment..those had to have hurt.

-Good main event, but the ending was the best. After Triple H hit Mankind with a chair, he clocked the Rock at the commentary table as well. I was laughing after that! New World champ..a night late! I have a feeling Rock and Triple H are fighting a million times again!

RAW Phat Stats

Matches: 6
Clean Wins: 1
Screwjobs: 2
No Contests: 2
Disqualifications: 1

======$$Well, RAW didn't have many clean win matches, but it had some good segments this week. This RAW was mainly used as a stepping stone for future angles. Good solid show, which will get a

B

for this week's show.

Wrestling News

-Wow, I hit a nerve yesterday with my DX comments. Surprised at how many hardcore DX fans there were. Just think though. Look at this week. X-Pac got pounded. Kane was always being attacked, and Road Dogg will probably never get a decent push again for his recent comments on certain wrestlers. I was just pointing out that none of those wrestlers are world champions, and if Jericho joined it would never give him any opportunity to become big. That's all.

-Wow, Raven walked out of a meeting prior to Nitro!! Bischoff said that anyone who wanted released from WCW during the meeting, can just walk out. Raven did. That's HUGE news folks, as he simply said hell with WCW. That explains he wasn't at Nitro this week. Where will he go? WWF? No way, he's probably going back to his home. The place where he became a superstar..and a world champion. I'm talking about ECW. He should go there, and show the world what he's made of again! (1wrestling.com)

@That's all for today. I'm wonder what kind of news will arrive this week following these Monday Night shows. So until the next column, just chill....

Lords of Pain: New Design, but same great News and Multimedia!!

Take Care, and Remember this Column is OPINIONATED!!

Mr. Tito © 1999

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