Welcome to the Friday edition of the Phat Daily Column, by yours truly, Mr. Tito. Sorry for not having a column yesterday, as around 3:00 pm, when I intended to write the column, I was going through some migraine headaches at the time and the pain in my head was enough to worry about instead of writing about wrestling. But all is fine today, and today will be a good day, for I'll be heading up to Pittsburgh for the day to see my Pirates whip up on the Cubs.
Today, I'll review WWF Smackdown and Tough Enough. On to the PDC.
Our first match of the night was Hurricane vs. Tajiri. Problem here is that both guys have jobbed so much up and until the Cruiserweight division started up, the crowd didn't care to pop. Plus, who was the face in this match? Decent bout between the two, but not mindblowing like the division should be. There's plenty of Cruiserweight blood out on the independent market, so why not buy them up for the bargin price that you currently can pay with a monopoly? The WWF needs to sorely build up Billy Kidman. He was the Alliance's Cruiserweight champion, then was injured, came back too quickly, injured again, and then kept off television until now. So seriously, do you think any of the 1998 fans would remember him? Half-assed effort for the Cruiserweight division, thus far.
Oh my God! Get a shirt on Prince Albert!!! His past tights hid how out of shape he truly was. And his father, George the Animal Steele at least looked funny with the body hair everywhere, but Albert, he looks like a major slob! And once again folks, we are witnessing yet another Albert push. He pounded on former partner Scotty 2 Hotty tonight, and then afterward, he pounded Scotty some more only for Rikishi to run down. Rikishi vs. Albert.... SMELL THE FUCKING RATINGS!?!?!?!?!?! No need to push wrestlers such as Lance Storm, Christian, Diamond Dallas Page, or others who are much better wrestlers. No, let's just push the same boring 1998-1999 guys who wrestle and act the same, night in and night out, such as Albert, Test, Rikishi (2000 guy, but still), and the Big Show.
Goofy backstage segment between Al Snow/Maven and Rico & Chuck & Suck. Maven and Al Snow are chums again? Weren't they just feuding over the Hardcore title?
Jericho cutting a promo on Hulk Hogan? Couldn't have happened in WCW...
Next match was Chris Jericho vs. Edge. About time we had a somewhat decent midcard match. Solid bout overall from both guys, and lots of near falls at the end. Someone from the creative team must be watching Steamboat vs. Macho Man from Wrestlemania 3 a lot lately. Nothing wrong with that. Too bad the WWF can't constantly push wrestlers who can put on good matches, such as what they did back then for Steamboat and Macho. Of course, Macho and Steamboat were out of their leagues for that time, so who knows? What I do know is that this had lots of Angle interference, which was the theme for tonight. After the match, Edge and Angle would brawl backstage, only for Jericho to help out. Hulk Hogan would then SLOWLY run to the scene. Yikes, get that man a walker or a wheelchair!
You know, as much as I hate goofy "sports entertainment" segments, the Vince McMahon sketch in finding a NEW "assistant" was hilarious. It had me on the floor, laughing. When Vince shouted at the guy who came to apply for the job, that was too much. Then, I was laughing at how bonkers the crowd was going for Stacy Keibler, who came out to a nicely mixed "Legs" song by Kid Rock. I'm telling you, it's something about her Ms. Hancock gimmick that turns everyone on. Good thing she didn't go under the knife for some unnecessary implants, for her real money makers are her legs. Indeed. Funny to see Vince's facial expressions during her dance and having her legs wrapped around his head.
TESTIFY! Looks like D'Von Dudley's singles career will be under the guidance of Vince McMahon, his new "financial" backer for being some kind of preacher. At least he has McMahon helping him out to give him some notice as a singles wrestler.
Ha! What the hell was that limo contest with Mark Henry? That was so out of the early 1990's, I wanted to puke!
Next match wasn't (har har) Al Snow vs. Chuck Palumbo. Lots of outside stuff with Maven, Billy Suck, and Rico. Palumbo seems even more limited as a wrestler due to his added muscle mass recently. He can't even Jungle Kick properly anymore. Snow won the match, probably meaning that we'll see Al Snow/Maven vs. Chuck & Suck at Backlash. Oh my. Nice to have a lack of good tag team wrestling lately.
Triple H and Hogan had a moment backstage... I'm wondering who will make who look bad at Backlash?
Triple H vs. Kurt Angle was the Main Event tonight. Not bad, but not as good as one of the regular matches they had after No Way Out, but we'll take what we can get. Lots of interference, and then Hogan would then slowly crawl to the ring to help Triple H win the match. That's a no no, and Triple H then chewed out Hogan afterward. The Clever Kurt Angle would then hit the Game into Hulk Hogan, meaning some dissention for Jericho/Angle vs. Hogan/Triple H, next week on Smackdown.
LAST WORD: Much better show than I anticipated, after actually reading the spoilers tonight. Still, lots of gaping wholes in the split WWF product, as witnessed tonight *cough* midcarders wasted on a Mark Henry Segment *cough**cough* pushing Albert *cough* . I'll go
Poor Jessie though. The poor girl gave a tremendous effort in the competition, but her body just couldn't go any further.
This show reeked of Real World at times, but featured lots of in-ring training scenes, too. Real World stuff came from part of the crew getting hammered at a bar/club, while the wrestling came from the Trainers getting PISSED OFF and just beating the living crap out of all of the wrestlers for not living responsibly. Then, instead of focusing on Alicia vs. Jessie as a feud, it looks like Mtv is pushing for the Pete and Jackie relationship. More power to Pete for eventually bagging her, since Jackie, as the Howard Stern show says it, is a "prize", but this is a show that determines who will get a WWF contract or not.
LAST WORD: This season of Tough Enough is incredibly weak compared to last season. At least the kids from the first season had some appreciation for the WWF, as Maven, Chris Harvard, Josh, Nidia and Taylor (at times) would take the sport seriously. Everyone on the Tough Enough 2 cast doesn't. Maybe it could be the change in trainers or something? Maybe Tazz did a better job on respect than Bob Holly has been doing? I pick Jake and Jackie to win it all.
AOL Instant Messenger: BookerTito - It's recommended that you send your questions or feedback as your first message so that it could be answered, instead of saying "hi", "hey", "what's up" or whatever else. Just get to the point, please, to make it easier since I get drilled with messages.
WRESTLEPALOOZA.com - Audio Show, Columns, News, and more!
KOLTERSHOCK!!! - A site that you shouldn't view with small children present!
X-Entertainment.com - One of the most entertaining pages on the net!
@That's it for today. Enjoy your weekend, and just chill till the next episode!
Take Care, and Thanks for Reading.